The Potions Master's Buttons

A/N: A while back, I wrote this piece for the Button Challenge at TPMM. I originally wrote this as a short fic, but after some prompting, I decided to continue this Snape/Rosmerta story. My thanks to Susan who volunteered to beta this story.


The Potions Master’s Buttons or Button, Button, Who’s Got the Button?
By Potionmistress60


Chapter 1 - Classroom Antics

The noise and commotion could be heard all the way down the hallway. Severus Snape’s pace quickened as he hastened towards his classroom. His robe billowed around him as if he were flying. He would have been the look of Byronic beauty and grace if it were not for the storm of anger across his features.

“Dear gods and Merlin, I can’t take another day of this! Heads are going to roll; be it Gryffindor or Slytherin!”

It was Snape’s last Potions class of the week, and he was hoping to get through it with some modicum of sanity. Gryffindor and Slytherin had been at each other for the past five days. Their teams were to play each other at Saturday’s Quidditch match, and by the sound of it, things had come to a head.

Snape took his frustrations out on the classroom door and kicked it open.

"SILENCE!"

The students immediately stopped what they were doing. The classroom looked like a Muggle photograph with the students caught in mid-motion. Snape wished he could hit all of them with Petrificus Totalus and let the dunderheads sit there like statues for the rest of the class time.

“I will not have my classroom turned into some barbaric cockfight in the back room of some seedy pub!” Snape declared. “Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, come here -- now!”

“Professor Snape!” Hermione Granger cried out. “It’s not their fault! They were minding their own business when …”

“I said SILENCE, Miss Granger! What part of that word don’t you comprehend?” The Potions master glared at the impertinent little know-it-all. “Perhaps your intelligence is overrated,” Snape said icily. “If you don’t prepare to keep that infernal mouth shut, you will be joining your so-called friends on a little adventure.”

Hermione was visibly upset at the unfairness, but thought it prudent to take her Potions professor’s advice. She gave Harry and Ron a sympathetic look and sat down at her desk.

Both boys looked at Snape, rolled their eyes and braced themselves for the worst.

“And, if I ever see you two roll your eyes at me again, I will personally pluck them out and simmer them in erampent fluid and bubotuber. Do I make myself perfectly clear?” The menacing tone of his voice caused more than a few students to find refuge in their books. Snape got the desired effect as Harry Potter and Ron Weasley paled and became more submissive.

As Snape looked up at the rest of the class, he noticed Draco Malfoy and his two sidekicks, Crabbe and Goyle, smirking.

“Mr. Malfoy, while I am sure that Messrs. Potter and Weasley were the instigators of this commotion, I have grown quite weary of your part in all of this. I want you and your two toadies to come up here as well.”

Snape took pleasure in seeing that smug little smile of Draco's wiped off his foolish face. If it weren’t for Lucius’ power and influence, he would have dealt with this Malfoy progeny a long time ago. As it were, Severus had to step lightly and put up the facade that Lucius’ offspring was his Slytherin golden boy.

“You and your uncontrolled behaviors have worn my patience to the quick,” Snape growled. “If I had the power to do so, I would cancel this infernal Quidditch match here and now. But since that is quite impossible, I am calling for an immediate detention in which all five of you will serve.”

The young wizards looked at each other, confused. It was not uncommon for their Potions instructor to give out detentions. This was part of the daily activities and was actually expected. Never in their years at Hogwarts, however, had they heard of Snape giving detention to those in his own House of Slytherin!

“And, since I am bound to teach Potions at this hour, I will have to turn you over into the hands of another. Miss Parkinson!” Snape called out. “Please retrieve Mr. Filch for me, immediately!”

All of the students’ eyes popped open wide, and they reminded Severus of the Owlery in the West Tower. If he weren’t in such a foul mood, he would have found it humorous.

Pansy Parkinson scuttled out of the classroom like a mouse being chased by a kneazle. It only seemed like moments later when she returned with old Filch in tow. Mr. Filch was the caretaker at Hogwarts, and although he was non-magical, one took great pains to avoid him. He was cantankerous at best and took great joy out of seeing Hogwarts students in misery.

“Mr. Filch,” Professor Snape said with false concern. “I have five Hogwarts students who need to learn proper classroom behavior. I’ve assured them that you would be only too glad to tutor them.”

Filch’s eyes took on a gleam of anticipation as he looked at Snape. He then turned to his newly acquired charges and smiled nastily. Four of the five boys swallowed hard and looked quite uneasy. Draco tried to appear calm and a bit indignant, but Severus could see the fear seeping out.

“Come along, laddies,” Filch cackled. “Ol' Professor Filch has got some teaching to do.”

The six of them filed out of the room one by one. It looked like they were participating in some form of death march. Filch could be heard talking to the unfortunate students and cackling all the way down the hallway.

Snape was amused by Filch’s zeal for torture and punishment. Once in a while, the old Squib would pull Snape aside and tell him about the good old days; when it was acceptable to inflict pain on students as a means of punishment. Severus would close his eyes and envision the various tortures described on Potter, Weasley, Longbottom and that insufferable know-it-all… Granger.

“Ah, but that Dumbledore, he took all the fun away,” Filch would lament.

The Potions class finally got underway, and with the catalysts removed all went fairly smoothly. Even Neville Longbottom managed to make it through without incident. Snape suspected Hermione Granger had her hand in helping him, but at this point he didn’t care. He just wanted to get this class done and over with. He had plans tonight and didn’t want to spend half the night scrubbing ooberpus out of his hair again.


With class over, Severus gathered up his things and headed down to his quarters. Word spread quickly of Snape’s mood and the classroom theatrics. The student body parted quickly as the dark man passed by. When he finally reached the solitude of his room, he threw his parchments and books on his desk and sat down in his favorite leather chair.

He gave a heavy sigh and smiled. “Now, Rosmerta, my attention is completely on you.”