Payback's a Bitch

Disclaimer: Now If I owned Harry Potter, do you really think I would
be pouring all my energy and time into this silly James and Lily Fic?
That's right, didn't think so.

Author's Note: This story, has a two muses…one of which is the recent
breakup of the love of my life and I…and the other, I've been dieing
to read a James and Lily fic like the one I'm about to write so much,
that I've been intrigued to write it. Be nice, it's my first fic.

Prologue

The sunlight was dazzling on the smooth surface of the lake.
On the bank where a of group of laughing girls, who had just left
the Great Hall, were sitting with shoes and socks off, cooling their
feet in the water.

Remus had pulled out a book and was reading. Sirius stared around at
the students milling over the grass, looking haughty and
bored, but very handsomely so. James was still playing with the
Snitch, letting it zoom farther and farther away, almost escaping but
always grabbed at the last second. Peter was watching him with wonder. Every time James made a particularly difficult catch,
Wormtail applauded him. After five minutes of this, Sirius wondered why James didn't tell Peter to get a grip on himself, but James seemed to be enjoying the attention. Remus noticed that he kept looking over at the girls by the water's edge.

"Put that away, will you?" said Sirius finally, as James made a fine
catch and Peter let out a cheer. "Before Wormtail wets himself
excitement."

Peter turned slightly pink, James grinned.

"If it bothers you," he said, stuffing the Snitch back in his pocket.
Peter had the distinct impression that Sirius was the only one for
whom James would have stopped showing off.

"I'm bored," said Sirius. "Wish it was a full moon."

"You might," said Lupin darkly from behind his book. "We've still got
Transfiguration, if you're bored you could test me….Here." He held
out his book.

Sirius snorted. "I don't need to look at that rubbish. I know it all."

"This'll liven you up, Padfoot," James quietly. "Look who it is…"

Sirius's head turned. He had become very still, like a dog that has
scented a rabbit.

"Excellent," he said softly. "Snivellus."

Peter turned to see what Sirius was looking at, Snape was on his feet again, and was stowing the O.W.L. paper in his bag. As he emerged from the shadows of the bushes and set off across the grass, Sirius and James stood up. Remus and Peter remained sitting: Remus was still staring down at his book, though his eyes were not moving and a faint frown line had appeared between his eyebrows. Peter was looking Sirius and James to Snape with a look of avid anticipation on his face.

"All right, Snivellus?" said James loudly.

Snape reacted so fast it was as though he had been expecting an
attack, dropping his bag he plunged his hand inside his robes, pulling
his wand halfway out when James shouted, "Expelliarmus!"

Snape's wand flew twelve feet into the air and fell with a little
thud in the grass behind him. Sirius let out a bark of laughter.
"Impedimenta!" Sirius yelled, pointing his wand at Snape, who was knocked off his feet, halfway through a dive towards his fallen wand.

Students all around had turned to watch. They had gotten to their feet and were edging nearer to watch. Some looked apprehensive, others entertained.

Snape lay panting on the ground. James and Sirius advanced on him,
wands up, James glancing over his shoulder at the girls at the
water's edge as he went. Peter was on his feet now, watching
hungrily, edging around Remus to get a clearer view.

"How'd the exam go, Snivelly?" said James.

"I was watching him, his nose was touching the parchment," said
Sirius viciously. "There'll be big grease marks all over it, they
won't be able to read a word."

Several people watching laughed, Peter sniggered shrilly. Snape was trying to get up, but the jinx was still operating on him; he was struggling, as though bound by invisible ropes.

"You – wait," he panted, staring up at James with an expression of
purest loathing. "You – wait…"

"Wait for what?" said Sirius coolly. "What're you going to do,
Snivelly, wipe your nose on us?"

Snape let out a stream of mixed swearwords and hexes, but his wand
being ten feet away nothing happened.

"Wash out your mouth," said James coldly. "Scourgify!"

Pink soap bubbles steamed from Snape's mouth at once" the froth was
covering his lips, making him gag, choking him...

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!'

James and Sirius looked around. James' free hand jumped to his hair
again.

It was one of the girls from the lakes edge. She had thick, dark red
hair that fell to her shoulders and startlingly green almond – shaped
eyes.

"All right, Evans?" said James, and the tone of his voice was
suddenly pleasant, deeper, more mature.

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated. She was looking at James with every
sign of great dislike. "What's he done to you?"

"Well," said James, appearing to deliberate the point, "it's more the
fact that he exists, if you know what I mean…"

Many of the surrounding watchers laughed, Sirius and Peter
included, but Remus, still apparently intent on his book, didn't, and
neither did Lily.

"You think you're funny," she said coldly. "But you're just an
arrogant, bullying git, Potter. Leave him alone."

"I will if you go out with me, Evans," said James quickly. "Go on…Go
out with me, and I'll never lay a wand on old Snevilly again."

Behind him, the Impediment Jinx was wearing off. Snape was beginning
to inch toward his fallen wand, spitting out soapsuds as he crawled.

"I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the
giant squid," said Lily.

"Bad luck, Prongs," said Sirius briskly, turning back to Snape. "OY!"

But too late; Snape had directed his wand straight at James; there
was a flash of light and a gash appeared on the side of James's face,
spattering his robes with blood. James whirled about; a second flash
of light later, Snape was hanging upside down in the air, his robes
falling over his head to reveal skinny, pallid legs and a pair of
graying underpants.

Many people in the small crowd watching cheered. Sirius, James, and
roared with laughter.

Lily, whose furious expression has twitched for an instant as though
she was going to smile, said, "Let him down!"

"Certainly," said James and he jerked his wand upward. Snape fell
into a crumpled heap on the ground. Disentangling himself from his
robes, he got up quickly to his feet, wand up, but Sirius
said, "Locomotor mortis!" and Snape keeled over again at once, rigid
as a board.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Lily shouted. She had her own wand out now. James and Sirius eyed it warily.

"Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you," said James earnestly.

"Take the curse off his, then!"

James sighed deeply, then turned to Snape and muttered the
countercurse.

"There you go," he said, as Snape struggled to his feet
again, "you're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus - "

"I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!"

Lily blinked. "Fine," she said coolly. "I won't bother in future. And
I'd wash your pants if I were you, Snivellus."

"Apologize to Evans!" James roared at Snape, his wand pointed
threateningly at him.

"I don't want you to make him apologize," Lily shouted, rounding on
James. "You're as bad as he is…"

"What?" yelped James. "I'd never call you a – you-know-what!"

"Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like
you've just got off you're broomstick, showing off with that stupid
Snitch, walking down corridors and hexing anyone who annoys you just
because you can – I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the
ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK!"

She turned on her heel and hurried away.

"Evans!" James shouted after her, "Hey, EVANS!"

But she didn't look back.

"What is it with her?" said James, trying and failing to look as
though this was a throwaway question of no real importance to him.

"Reading between the lines, I'd say she thinks you're a bit
conceited, mate," said Sirius.

"Right," said James, who looked furious now, "right –"

o – o