Untrue Fantasies
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Harry/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
5
Views:
14,720
Reviews:
20
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Harry/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
5
Views:
14,720
Reviews:
20
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Untrue Fantasies
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or anything related to it.
Chapter 1 - OMG NO!
\"Oh my GOD\"
Those words resonated in the common room as Ron and Harry asked back, \"What?\"
Hermione was sifting through transcripts of adult fanfiction from her American pen pal when she said, \"You wouldn\'t believe the crap that people write about us.\"
Ron put down his mushroom and asked, \"Like what?\"
\"For instance...this one story where Harry comes to my house for the summer and we apparently have mad sex in a hot tub.\"
Harry dropped his glass of milk and said, \"WHAT? You have a hot tub?!\"
\"...also, this one weird story where Ron goes to Draco\'s flat and-\"
By this point Ron had fully sunk his fingers into his ears and was repeating, \"I\'mnotintogaystuffI\'mnotintogaystuffI\'mnotinto...\"
\"Goodness me,\" said Hermione, \"You don\'t think these people actually think we live like this, do they?\"
\"Apparently so...\", said Harry slowly, \"...but do you think at any point we could-\"
\"NO.\", said Ron with indignation...then realizing that Harry was talking to Hermione.
Hermione turned her head to Harry, then to Ron, then to Harry, then to her smut fiction, then back to Filch, then to...FILCH?!
\"That\'s right, Filch.\", said...Filch \"Damn straight, writer, I\'m here for a meaningless cameo before I jump out of that window.\"
But instead of jumping out of the window he simply walked out with his pants on.
\"Well,\" said Harry \"better go masturbate.\"
...in awe at what Harry had just said, Hermione replied with \"...wuh?\"
\"You heard me. I\'m going to please myself and so on and so forth.\"
\"...wait a second,\" said Hermione, madly flipping through the stories of lust \"...this was done in one of these fanfictions! Where you masturbated and I walked in on you and then you...\'pressed me against the wall, my legs wrapped around your waist, panting madly at the friction of your cock driving through\'...\"
Silence...the awkward kind.
Hermione coughed and continued, \"Well, that\'s not going to happen, mister! I\'m not going to become what these dirty minds think I am! I\'m a good girl! Innocent! and...uh...not...\'impaled\'...yet...just yet, anyways......END OF TRANSMISSION!!\"
She then ran into the girls\' dormitories leaving Harry and Ron staring at each other, when Ron finally said, \"NO means no!\"
Then Ron ran away.
Harry sat by himself thinking, \"...what was I going to do, again?\"
A/N: This is an idea for a kinky satire I\'m planning and ot sure if its good enough to continue. So please review and tell me your thoughts.
Chapter 1 - OMG NO!
\"Oh my GOD\"
Those words resonated in the common room as Ron and Harry asked back, \"What?\"
Hermione was sifting through transcripts of adult fanfiction from her American pen pal when she said, \"You wouldn\'t believe the crap that people write about us.\"
Ron put down his mushroom and asked, \"Like what?\"
\"For instance...this one story where Harry comes to my house for the summer and we apparently have mad sex in a hot tub.\"
Harry dropped his glass of milk and said, \"WHAT? You have a hot tub?!\"
\"...also, this one weird story where Ron goes to Draco\'s flat and-\"
By this point Ron had fully sunk his fingers into his ears and was repeating, \"I\'mnotintogaystuffI\'mnotintogaystuffI\'mnotinto...\"
\"Goodness me,\" said Hermione, \"You don\'t think these people actually think we live like this, do they?\"
\"Apparently so...\", said Harry slowly, \"...but do you think at any point we could-\"
\"NO.\", said Ron with indignation...then realizing that Harry was talking to Hermione.
Hermione turned her head to Harry, then to Ron, then to Harry, then to her smut fiction, then back to Filch, then to...FILCH?!
\"That\'s right, Filch.\", said...Filch \"Damn straight, writer, I\'m here for a meaningless cameo before I jump out of that window.\"
But instead of jumping out of the window he simply walked out with his pants on.
\"Well,\" said Harry \"better go masturbate.\"
...in awe at what Harry had just said, Hermione replied with \"...wuh?\"
\"You heard me. I\'m going to please myself and so on and so forth.\"
\"...wait a second,\" said Hermione, madly flipping through the stories of lust \"...this was done in one of these fanfictions! Where you masturbated and I walked in on you and then you...\'pressed me against the wall, my legs wrapped around your waist, panting madly at the friction of your cock driving through\'...\"
Silence...the awkward kind.
Hermione coughed and continued, \"Well, that\'s not going to happen, mister! I\'m not going to become what these dirty minds think I am! I\'m a good girl! Innocent! and...uh...not...\'impaled\'...yet...just yet, anyways......END OF TRANSMISSION!!\"
She then ran into the girls\' dormitories leaving Harry and Ron staring at each other, when Ron finally said, \"NO means no!\"
Then Ron ran away.
Harry sat by himself thinking, \"...what was I going to do, again?\"
A/N: This is an idea for a kinky satire I\'m planning and ot sure if its good enough to continue. So please review and tell me your thoughts.