I'm Beautiful, Damn It!
folder
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Draco/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
21
Views:
11,310
Reviews:
32
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Het - Male/Female › Draco/Hermione
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
21
Views:
11,310
Reviews:
32
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Of Ferrets and Crotch Pheasants
Disclaimer -- I don\'t own any part of the Harry Potter universe and I\'m not making any money from this story. This applies to all future chapters.
A/N: As with the other story, I\'m leaving all my old author\'s notes in the chapters. There are currently 19 chapters, but I probably won\'t upload them all today. Please try and bear in mind while reading this, that its just some silly fanfic that Stefanie and I wrote, not the Great American Novel.
BTW, it gets better as the chapters go up.
Also, I just checked my reviews and realized I got a bad one :::cries::: Allow me to reiterate, this is some stupid fanfic, not the Great American Novel and yea, maybe it won\'t make a lot of sense to a lot of people, but just take it with a grain of salt. And I didn\'t realize my paragraphs were running together. I\'ll fix this tomorrow morning!! :o)
I\'m Beautiful, Damn it!
Chapter 1- Of Ferrets and Crotch Pheasants
Hermione entered the Great Hall radiating confidence. This year was different. She had finally reaped the benefits of her last 6 years of hard work. Head Girl! Pride gleamed from her every pore. Though there had been a few choice wise cracks from Harry and Ron at her new title (Hey Hermione, school policy states that if we\'re feeling \"lonely\" we should feel free to visit the Head Girl in her quarters...) a death glare stopped any further commentary in its tracks. If anyone could give the stink eye, it was Hermione.
She joined her friends at the Gryffindor table. Harry and Ron began to stuff food unceremoniously into their gaping mouths, but something was tugging at the back of her mind. Who was Head Boy? Her congratulatory letter from Professor McGonagall hadn\'t told her. Her eyes scanned the other house tables. Hopefully it would be someone withstand able as they would be sharing a common room as well as working together on several projects. Surely it was a Ravenclaw. Hermione rose up off her seat a little and craned her neck for a better view of the table, but it was a pointless effort. The answer to her nagging question was staring her in the face......or more like, the back of her head.
Strangely enough, it wasn\'t his stare that alerted her to his presence. Nor was it his, tall, towering form brooding over her. It wasn\'t even the two neanderthals that seemed to perpetually flank him. It was his smirk. It seared through the back of her head like a red-hot coal.
\"Well, if it isn\'t everyone\'s favorite Mudblood!\" he cried in mock joy.......as he adjusted the shiny, Head Boy badge pinned proudly to his chest.
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Her eyes were narrowed to mere slits, but there was also a look of potent shock mixed within her look of hatred. His smirk widened. She obviously hadn\'t been informed that he was now her partner in crime. Well, he was especially pleased to have been the one to pop the proverbial cherry. She was shooting him a look of pure malice and he wouldn\'t have given it up for all the galleons in the world.
\"What may I do for you, Ferret?\" she replied.
He frowned at being reminded of his umm...unfortunate incident in 4th year.
\"It wasn\'t my fault, damn it.\" his mind grumbled.
He took a moment to compose himself. Hopefully she wouldn\'t notice how her words had flustered him.
\"Professor McGonagall requests our presence for a momentary briefing on our living quarters.\" Bitch, he added at the end in his mind. He stopped to ponder why he had only added this comment in his mind, but then he resigned himself to the fact that maybe it might be better not to stir up trouble. The last thing we needed was to get Red\'s blood pressure up, especially since Crabbe and Goyle had long since returned to their dinners.
He seemed to be quite protective of the piece of filth, but then again, when you live in a box and filth is all you have, he supposed he\'d be a bit sensitive about it as well.
She dabbed her mouth with her napkin and elegantly rose from the table.
Who exactly does she think she is? Head Girl, not Grand Witch Supreme.
He extended his arm to her as an offer to escort her to the faculty table and thoroughly enjoyed the disgusted look her received in reply.
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Our living quarters........
The words were like a bee sting in her brain. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye periodically. He was walking a very casual pace wearing that ever-infuriating smirk.
Look at him. Loafing about like he owns the place.....
As they reached the faculty table, Professor Mcgonagal rose to meet them.
“Congratulations! Your diligence has finally paid off!” she beamed at Hermione. It seems she took little notice of Draco’s presence.
“As you know, you will be sharing a common room, but of course, you will have your own private bedchambers. It is very important that you know once the portrait to your bedchamber closes, the first spoken word will be your new password. Choose carefully, as it will be set for the rest of the year and it quite irreversible.” She wished them a good evening and they made their ways back to their respective tables.
ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾
Hermionie felt like a deflated balloon. She’d held such high hopes for her last year only to have the squashed by Draco the Wonder Ferret. Absent-mindedly, her eyes wandered over to the Slytherin table only to find......Malfoy was gone. She scanned the Great Hall and found him and another Slytherin towering over a terrified first year. She immediately recognized the smug, holier-than-thou look on his face as Blaise Zambini lectured the shaking child on the superiority of the Slytherin House. His cold gray eyes met hers and he gave her an evil grin before tapping Blaise’s shoulder and disappearing in the direction of their newly shared common room.
ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾
He could he Hermione hot on his heels as he strode across the common room.
“It’s an abuse of power, Malfoy! I hoped that maybe, just maybe when you accepted this position that you would grow up! But obviously, I was sadly mistaken!!“ she spat with such force and venom that her blood flushed her face a mild tomato red. But the lecture wasn\'t over.
“I for one am taking my appointment very seriously. If I ever EVER catch wind of another....shenanigan like this I will report directly to Professor Mcgonnogal you.....YOU inbred ferret!!”
Malfoy‘s approach to the situation was to ignore her fiery tirade and retreat to the comfort of his own private room. Let her give herself a coronary. Who cared, really? But Blaise was never the one to ignore a good quarrel. Nor the chance to hand out insults.
Malfoys bedroom portrait swung open and both boys entered, but just as the portrait clicked shut Blaise turned and pointed an angry finger and bellowed in a triumphant voice
“Crotch Pheasant!!!!!!”
It was too late. McGonnogal’s words fell like soft rain in their minds. Blaise\'s mouth bobbed open and shut like a fish out of water trying desperately to word an apology. Malfoy simply closed his eyes. The damage was done.
Obviously, Hermionie had heard his umm...choice insult for her and knew well what this meant. Her violent snorts of laughter could be heard echoing off the common room walls.
A/N: Whew! That\'s not as easy as it looks! Well, there you have it! Our first chapter :::beams with pride::: Please R&R! And remember, we’re fanfic virgins, so be gentle :o)
A/N: As with the other story, I\'m leaving all my old author\'s notes in the chapters. There are currently 19 chapters, but I probably won\'t upload them all today. Please try and bear in mind while reading this, that its just some silly fanfic that Stefanie and I wrote, not the Great American Novel.
BTW, it gets better as the chapters go up.
Also, I just checked my reviews and realized I got a bad one :::cries::: Allow me to reiterate, this is some stupid fanfic, not the Great American Novel and yea, maybe it won\'t make a lot of sense to a lot of people, but just take it with a grain of salt. And I didn\'t realize my paragraphs were running together. I\'ll fix this tomorrow morning!! :o)
I\'m Beautiful, Damn it!
Chapter 1- Of Ferrets and Crotch Pheasants
Hermione entered the Great Hall radiating confidence. This year was different. She had finally reaped the benefits of her last 6 years of hard work. Head Girl! Pride gleamed from her every pore. Though there had been a few choice wise cracks from Harry and Ron at her new title (Hey Hermione, school policy states that if we\'re feeling \"lonely\" we should feel free to visit the Head Girl in her quarters...) a death glare stopped any further commentary in its tracks. If anyone could give the stink eye, it was Hermione.
She joined her friends at the Gryffindor table. Harry and Ron began to stuff food unceremoniously into their gaping mouths, but something was tugging at the back of her mind. Who was Head Boy? Her congratulatory letter from Professor McGonagall hadn\'t told her. Her eyes scanned the other house tables. Hopefully it would be someone withstand able as they would be sharing a common room as well as working together on several projects. Surely it was a Ravenclaw. Hermione rose up off her seat a little and craned her neck for a better view of the table, but it was a pointless effort. The answer to her nagging question was staring her in the face......or more like, the back of her head.
Strangely enough, it wasn\'t his stare that alerted her to his presence. Nor was it his, tall, towering form brooding over her. It wasn\'t even the two neanderthals that seemed to perpetually flank him. It was his smirk. It seared through the back of her head like a red-hot coal.
\"Well, if it isn\'t everyone\'s favorite Mudblood!\" he cried in mock joy.......as he adjusted the shiny, Head Boy badge pinned proudly to his chest.
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Her eyes were narrowed to mere slits, but there was also a look of potent shock mixed within her look of hatred. His smirk widened. She obviously hadn\'t been informed that he was now her partner in crime. Well, he was especially pleased to have been the one to pop the proverbial cherry. She was shooting him a look of pure malice and he wouldn\'t have given it up for all the galleons in the world.
\"What may I do for you, Ferret?\" she replied.
He frowned at being reminded of his umm...unfortunate incident in 4th year.
\"It wasn\'t my fault, damn it.\" his mind grumbled.
He took a moment to compose himself. Hopefully she wouldn\'t notice how her words had flustered him.
\"Professor McGonagall requests our presence for a momentary briefing on our living quarters.\" Bitch, he added at the end in his mind. He stopped to ponder why he had only added this comment in his mind, but then he resigned himself to the fact that maybe it might be better not to stir up trouble. The last thing we needed was to get Red\'s blood pressure up, especially since Crabbe and Goyle had long since returned to their dinners.
He seemed to be quite protective of the piece of filth, but then again, when you live in a box and filth is all you have, he supposed he\'d be a bit sensitive about it as well.
She dabbed her mouth with her napkin and elegantly rose from the table.
Who exactly does she think she is? Head Girl, not Grand Witch Supreme.
He extended his arm to her as an offer to escort her to the faculty table and thoroughly enjoyed the disgusted look her received in reply.
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN
Our living quarters........
The words were like a bee sting in her brain. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye periodically. He was walking a very casual pace wearing that ever-infuriating smirk.
Look at him. Loafing about like he owns the place.....
As they reached the faculty table, Professor Mcgonagal rose to meet them.
“Congratulations! Your diligence has finally paid off!” she beamed at Hermione. It seems she took little notice of Draco’s presence.
“As you know, you will be sharing a common room, but of course, you will have your own private bedchambers. It is very important that you know once the portrait to your bedchamber closes, the first spoken word will be your new password. Choose carefully, as it will be set for the rest of the year and it quite irreversible.” She wished them a good evening and they made their ways back to their respective tables.
ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾
Hermionie felt like a deflated balloon. She’d held such high hopes for her last year only to have the squashed by Draco the Wonder Ferret. Absent-mindedly, her eyes wandered over to the Slytherin table only to find......Malfoy was gone. She scanned the Great Hall and found him and another Slytherin towering over a terrified first year. She immediately recognized the smug, holier-than-thou look on his face as Blaise Zambini lectured the shaking child on the superiority of the Slytherin House. His cold gray eyes met hers and he gave her an evil grin before tapping Blaise’s shoulder and disappearing in the direction of their newly shared common room.
ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾ƒ¾
He could he Hermione hot on his heels as he strode across the common room.
“It’s an abuse of power, Malfoy! I hoped that maybe, just maybe when you accepted this position that you would grow up! But obviously, I was sadly mistaken!!“ she spat with such force and venom that her blood flushed her face a mild tomato red. But the lecture wasn\'t over.
“I for one am taking my appointment very seriously. If I ever EVER catch wind of another....shenanigan like this I will report directly to Professor Mcgonnogal you.....YOU inbred ferret!!”
Malfoy‘s approach to the situation was to ignore her fiery tirade and retreat to the comfort of his own private room. Let her give herself a coronary. Who cared, really? But Blaise was never the one to ignore a good quarrel. Nor the chance to hand out insults.
Malfoys bedroom portrait swung open and both boys entered, but just as the portrait clicked shut Blaise turned and pointed an angry finger and bellowed in a triumphant voice
“Crotch Pheasant!!!!!!”
It was too late. McGonnogal’s words fell like soft rain in their minds. Blaise\'s mouth bobbed open and shut like a fish out of water trying desperately to word an apology. Malfoy simply closed his eyes. The damage was done.
Obviously, Hermionie had heard his umm...choice insult for her and knew well what this meant. Her violent snorts of laughter could be heard echoing off the common room walls.
A/N: Whew! That\'s not as easy as it looks! Well, there you have it! Our first chapter :::beams with pride::: Please R&R! And remember, we’re fanfic virgins, so be gentle :o)