In My Mind

Disclaimer: All character, save Duncan, belong to the lovely JK Rowling. They decided to come out and play today, and well...we are all having a bit of fun! No copyright infringement is intended. Imitation is the highest form of flattery, right?

A/N: I\'ve been toying with this fic for a few weeks now on and off. I wasn\'t going to post it until it was done, considering I\'m working on three others right now for this site. *grins* But, alas, my lovely and fickle muse, Ara, has informed me that she\'d turn into the Inspiration Nazi (No inspiration, two years!!) if I didn\'t. I\'m posting longer chapters than I normally do, and because of this, I\'m afraid this story is going to be updated a bit slower than some of my others. But, on the bright side, there won\'t be any evil cliffies...Ok, there probably will be, but I promise I\'ll be gentle. I suppose we should get on with the story, eh?

Muse Note: Don\'t listen to her! If I get reviews, I\'ll personally make sure she updates regularly. I\'m a muse. I can be very persuasive.


“Harry, come back to us. Harry…”

The members of the Order of the Phoenix stood around the bed of Harry Potter. He’d managed to destroy Voldemort, but in the end, it had drained him of every ounce of strength, physical and magical, and he’d fallen into a coma. Hermione sat by his bedside and stroked his left hand talking to him. She begged him to come back to them so he could rejoice along with everyone else in the wizarding world. His best friend Ron was just as distraught. Dumbledore and the rest of the older members stood solemnly and watched as his two best friends kept vigil at his side.

Hermione insisted on talking to him as though he were awake. It was something muggle doctors had the family of coma patients do. Ron and the twins would tell him jokes and Hermione would read him different articles in Quidditch Weekly. Things went on pretty much the same way for nigh on six weeks. On Saturday, the beginning of the seventh week, Severus Snape burst into the hospital wing followed by Dumbledore.

“Weasley, Granger…Out!”

Dumbledore sighed and smiled at the teens. “Miss Granger, Mr. Weasley, we may have discovered a way to bring Harry out of his coma, or at least let us know that he’s still with us. It is going to be a very delicate process and Professor Snape and I will need you to leave for a few hours. Why don’t you two go to the Burrow, have lunch, and rest a bit. I’m sure this vigil you’ve kept has exhausted you.”

Before he could finish Ron and Hermione both opened their mouths to protest. He held up his hand and finished with a twinkle in his eyes. “I’ll floo you as soon as we know if this will work. Now, please, follow me to my office and you can go from there.”

Ron glared at Snape. “You better not hurt him or I’ll…”

Snape glared right back and threw in a sneer with it. “You’ll do what, Weasley?”

“He’s not the one you should worry about, Professor. You know that,” Hermione answered in a dangerous tone as she grabbed Ron by the arm and made her way out of the hospital.

Dumbledore’s eyes twinkled brightly at his potions master. “Well, Severus, I’ll let you get to it and see what you come up with!”

Dumbledore turned and left the room with a smile so bright that it rivaled the canary yellow robes he wore.

Snape looked at the pale young man in the bed. For all of the years he’d spent taunting and degrading the boy, he almost felt sorry for him to be in the state he was in. Almost. He’d worked day and night to come up with something to return the boy to his usual state, and the solutions was as plain as the nose on his face. Liligimancy. Harry was a practiced Occulmens, and could keep Snape out, but the potions master hoped that in his current state, that Harry’s defenses would be down.

“Potter, if this doesn’t work, you may be years recouping. You’re still an attention starved brat. I still don’t like you. I’m doing this for Albus.”

With that admission, he cast the spell and found himself in Harry’s mind. He searched for any trace of anything Harry, but he found nothing. There was simply a black void. Snape poked around and wandered in the void for what seemed like hours until he found a door. He found the door to be an odd structure and promptly knocked on it. It felt very solid. When no one answered, he knocked louder and tried to push his way into it. At that precise moment, the door was snatched open and he was met with a very loud and echoing, “WHAT?”

From the other side, Harry stood looking at his old potions master and he grinned sheepishly. “Oh, it’s you, sorry. Hey, what are you doing here?”

Severus rolled his eyes, “I’ve come to get you Potter.”

Harry laughed. “You can’t just ‘come get’ me. You know I could push you out right now if I wanted to. Instead, though, why don’t you come in?”

Professor Snape looked beyond Harry to see a landscape of green meadows and perfect sunshine. In the background he could see a large two story manor type home. He hesitated crossing the threshold. “It’s ok, Sev, this is the place in my mind that I locked everything away in when I finally got the hang of Occulmency. You’ll be able to leave whenever you want. You just can’t get in unless I invite you.”

He stepped through against his better judgment. “Potter, what is this place?”

Taking the older man by the elbow, Harry grinned. In the blink of an eye, they were in the sitting room of the manor with two steaming cups of tea between them. “This is my sanctuary. It’s a place I constructed using the meditation exercises you showed me while I was learning occulmency. I don’t think I did a bad job.”

“It is indeed impressive, Potter. Now, I need you to come back with me to the land of the living. Granger and Weasley have been sitting by your side constantly for six weeks. They both look three times their age.”

Harry shook his head. “I can’t go back just yet, Sev. It’s a bit complicated. Just suffice it to say that I can’t come back just yet. Can you give Herm and Ron a message for me?”

“If I must, Potter. First, though, if you can’t tell me why you can’t come back, can you tell me why you call me Sev? My older sister used to call me that and it grated on my nerves.”

Harry’s eyes twinkled with mirth. “I do it because I give all of those that I love a nickname. You’ll be no different than any of the Weasley’s, Remy, and before he fell through the veil, Siri. Now, I have a feeling that Herm and Ron will question if you’ve actually talked to me. Tell Ron to share his stash with Herm, that she’ll like it. Tell Herm that she really should watch her Marilyn Monroe moments.”

Harry smirked at the quizzical expression on the older man’s face. “Marilyn Monroe moments?”

“Yes, in sixth year, Herm was standing out by the lake and her uniform skirt flew straight up in a gust of wind. I almost hurt myself laughing and Ron almost fainted at the sight of her knickers. Oh, also tell her that I still want to borrow them.”

Snape’s face paled. “Potter that was too much information! You should be ashamed of yourself.”

“You know, Sev, you aren’t your usual stone faced self while you’re in my mind. I like seeing your various expressions. It makes you look almost human,” Harry laughed. “I’m just kidding. Also, use their nicknames when you talk to them. They’ll know without a doubt then.”

“Well, Potter, I must be going. I’m sure it’s been days on the other side of your thick skull and I’ve got everyone worried.”

Harry walked him to the door and touched his shoulder, “When will you be back, Sev?”

“I’ll not be back until you are conscious.”

A hint of sadness was in Harry’s green eyes as he looked at the older man. “Come back once more, please. I’ve something that I want to show you. Tell everyone I’m sorry for this wait, but that I’m really ok. Tell them about my place and let them know that I’m comfortable and well fed and I’ve even been reading some of the classics from my library. Tell them I’ve been swimming and fishing and I’ll be back before they know it. Thanks for coming, Sev. Give them all my love.”

Severus walked out of the door and it closed with a certain finality. He wasn’t sure that he’d ever be able to find it again, but he didn’t really want to. He made his way out of Harry’s mind to find the hospital empty. He yelled for Poppy to fire-call Dumbledore and get him in there. It was only a moment before the old wizard was walking from Poppy’s office with a puzzled look on his face.

“Severus, my boy, you’ve only been in long enough for me to get back to my office. I take this is not good news, then?”

“It’s only been how long?”

“It’s been maybe ten minutes my boy. What did you find out?”

Snape rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Harry’s fine. He’s retreated into this place in his mind that he says he created when he was learning occulmency. He gave me messages to give to Granger and Weasley, and he told me that he wasn’t coming out for a while. I told him he was stubborn and that he wouldn’t have any visitors until he did. He just laughed at me and gave me a nickname.” At this last admission he shuddered visibly, obviously in disgust.

Dumbledore chuckled. “That sounds like Harry. You know you’ll have to go back, don’t you? We have to find out exactly why he’s retreated into his mind and he can’t come out.”

Snape rubbed his temples. “I knew you were going to say that. Why can’t you go? You are a liligimens.”

Dumbledore’s eyes twinkled. “I’ve a suspicion as to why he can’t come out, and that is the only reason I’m asking you to go back in.”

Snape sighed. “Should I go back in before Weasley and Granger come back?”

“It would be best.”

Snape begrudgingly went back in and found the door easier the second time. Harry opened it as he went to knock. “Come in Sev!”

Harry quickly closed the door and smiled at the taller man. “You’ve been gone ages. I was beginning to wonder if you were going to keep your word about not coming back.”

“Dumbledore made me.”

Giving Severus a hearty laugh and a pat on the shoulder Harry answered, “I figured as much. Don’t worry, I can’t tell him no either. Let’s back to the manor, shall we?”

At that question, both me found themselves standing in a large ballroom in the manor. It was roughly the size of the Great Hall with windows from floor to ceiling. There were many tapestries lining the walls and a baby grand piano in one corner. Harry moved to sit and a chair appeared under him. He conjured Severus one and gestured that he should sit too. “You know, Sev, this is my favorite room in the whole manor. There’s just something about the tapestries on the walls that makes it feel like home in here. That, and I’ve always wanted to learn to play the piano, so here, I’ve got a baby grand.”

“I’d have never pinned you for such sophistication, Potter,” Snape said sarcastically as he took in the cavernous room.

“There are many things that you wouldn’t suspect me of, Sev. I assure you that after not having anything in all of my life I have found a penchant for the finer things since leaving Hogwarts. It’s also made me appreciate things like a summer breeze blowing through my hair and walking in a park in the fall more.”

Snape snorted. “You’ll always be a spoiled little brat to me.”

Harry smiled. “The only person who’s spoiled me is me. Come back in five years and you’ll see spoiled.”

At that moment a young child, a little boy, walked in the room. His eyes lit up and he crawled into Harry’s lap. Snape looked at the black eyed little boy with messy hair. “Who is this?”

“I’m Duncan,” the little boy answered.

Severus raised an eyebrow. “Duncan?”

Harry chuckled and whispered something into the boy’s ear and then gave him a hug. He slid from his lap and made his way out of the room. “Sev, what is the one thing that I’ve always wanted? Oh, wait, you’d never know that. You’ve always been too busy insulting me to realize that I’m more like my mother than my father. The one thing I’ve always wanted has been a family. Duncan showed up shortly after I came here after the battle, though he was not a conscious addition.” Harry gave Snape a wicked grin. “Does he look familiar to you?”

“He looks like you when you first started school. Why did you choose the name Duncan?”

Harry smirked and evaded the question. “What do you say about the grand tour? Let’s walk out back to the rose garden.”

Harry moved from the chair to the wall and a door appeared. Severus followed him outside under the warm sun and into the garden. There were roses of every size and color out there, but Harry kept walking until they came upon a stream. “This is where I spend most of my time. This little stream is so peaceful and everything around it is perfect.”

“Why are you hiding here?”

Harry looked up from his seat on the grass. “You haven’t figured it out yet?”

“No, and I’m really in no mood to play games.”

For the first time since Severus had met with Harry, he saw genuine sadness across Harry’s features. “It’s Voldemort. When I killed him he somehow managed to get into my head. He’s the blackness you found. I’ve not let him take over, but I have no idea how to defeat him. I’ve got to find a way to sever the link between us completely. Once I do that, I can expel him from my body and he will be truly gone. Until then, I’ve had to shut myself down physically and retreat here. The door keeping me in is the only thing keeping him out. It’s the only think keeping him from taking over my body and carrying on as me. I have a feeling that he let you come through because he still believes that you are loyal to him. Unfortunately, the only thing I don’t have in my library is something on severing magical bonds. Will you help me?

“As much as I love it here, I want to be back with you guys, with my family. I don’t want to be a prisoner in my own mind. Get Herm and Ron to help. Maybe there’s something in Hogwarts, or maybe in your personal library? Ginny, get her help too; she knows what it’s like to be possessed by Voldemort.”

With this information, Severus sat on the ground next to Harry. “I...I’m at a loss for words, Potter. How could you allow him to just enter your mind?”

Harry lay back on the grass relishing the feeling on his skin. “I’m not sure exactly what happened, but I think that he got in when I went unconscious. All of my walls fell when I blacked out. I suppose it was inevitable.”

Severus’ mind was working quickly. He’d never heard of anyone being able to do what Harry claimed Tom Riddle did. Harry rose abruptly. “Let’s go back to the manor. I know that you won’t be staying long and I’m rather lonely sometimes. Let’s go find Duncan.”

The little boy was waiting for them when they got to the sitting room. He crawled into Harry’s lap and snuggled close to the young man. “I missed you Dad,” he whispered.

Harry stroked his messy raven locks. “I missed you to, Love.”

Severus watched the interaction and observed the little boy. He took in the child’s features. His hair was definitely Harry’s, as was his mouth and the shape of his face. The young boy’s eyes were dark, almost black, and his nose was rather long and aristocratic. In short, the little boy was beautiful.

He hated to break up the moment, but he knew that he had to be going, so Severus cleared his throat. Harry and Duncan both looked at him and smiled. “I really must be going, Potter. I’ll relay the information you’ve given me to Dumbledore and when they come back, I’ll tell Granger and Weasley what you told me.”

Duncan slid off of Harry’s lap and took his hand. They walked Severus back to the door. “Will we see you again?” Duncan asked.

“I’m sure you will, since Dumbledore won’t be able to come next time.”

The little boy’s eyes went wide and he grinned back and forth between the two men. “Ok, Dad and I will wait for you. I’m going to the library Dad. I want to do some reading.”

He waved goodbye to Severus and disappeared. Harry smiled. “He’s a brilliant kid.”

Snape rolled his eyes. “Potter, he’s a figment of your imagination.”

Chuckling Harry retorted, “All of this is a figment of my imagination, so I’m going to relish it while I’m here. Sev, come back as soon as you can. I’m glad I’ve got a line into the world of the living.” He hugged the older man and continued, “I’m glad you came to look for me. Thank you.”

Severus was surprised when Harry hugged him, but as a reaction, he hugged him back. “I’ll have everyone doing what they can to help you. We’ll have you out of here in no time.”

He made his way quickly out of Harry’s mind and was surprised to hear voices talking in hushed tones in Poppy’s office. He was tired, but he had to tell Dumbledore what he knew. He walked into the office and everyone looked at him. In no time a borage of questions were thrown at him. He held up his hand and silenced the teens.

“I’ve talked to Harry. He’s ok.”

Ron interjected, “How do we know you actually talked to him?”

Snape laughed at the question. His reaction took everyone in the room by surprise. “He told me you’d ask that, Mr. Weasley so he gave me a message for both you and Miss Granger. He told me to tell you, ‘Ron you should share your stash with Herm, she’ll like it.’ Ron immediately flushed a violent shade of red. Miss Granger, he told me to tell you, ‘You really should watch your Marilyn Monroe moments.’ At this, Hermione turned a shade of red to rival Ron. He also told me to tell you in regards to your Marilyn moments that you still ‘haven’t let him borrow…’”

Hermione abruptly stopped Snape, “Ok, we know that you have definitely talked to Harry. Why can’t he wake up?”

Snape turned to Dumbledore. “That is a complicated matter. We need to floo the whole Order, and Ginny Weasley. When everyone is here, I’ll relay what he told me. Right now, I’m going to my quarters and I’m going to take a nap. I’m entirely too exhausted to do much more.”

When he got to his quarters, Snape collapsed onto his bed without changing or even removing his shoes. His dreams were filled with a black void and snake like eyes. They changed to scenes from the manor and Harry and Duncan playing the piano. The little boy glared at him and he sat straight up in his bed with a gasp.

Snape paced his rooms thinking about the little boy in Harry’s sanctuary. That child had given him the glare that he gave his students. He thought about the child’s features. Why didn’t I see it? He’s got my eyes! Oh, the child is cursed with my nose! Harry’s son is mine!

This was a very sobering thought. Snape had never seen himself with a family. Thoughts of children brought up his awful childhood and he made a promise to himself never to have children so they wouldn’t have to go through what he did. He knew that he had to go back to see Harry. Severus feared that the child was not a figment, but something else. He burst into the hospital wing, robes billowing, and barked something at Poppy. Then he turned his attention to the young man and woman at Harry’s bedside. “Out!” he bellowed.

They both gave him hard looks but did leave the infirmary. “Poppy,” he said softly, “I’ve got something I need to ask you to do, for me.”

Poppy smiled that motherly smile and answered him with, “Severus, you know I’ll do anything I can for you.”

He was looking extremely pale to the medi-witch, but she didn’t say anything. “I’ve got to talk to Harry again and then I have a specific test I want you to run. This must stay between us, though. Albus can’t even know.”

Her mouth was set in a straight line, but she nodded curtly. She knew that when Severus asked for tests he already had a diagnosis, and was right more times than not. She gave him the privacy he needed to get into Harry’s head.

Harry opened the door for the third time that day. This time, Severus was met not only with emerald green eyes twinkling at him, but also a smaller pair of obsidian ones. “Come in Sev! We hoped you’d come back!”

“Potter,” he softly spoke, “who exactly is that child?”

Harry chuckled. “Duncan, would you like to tell him your whole name and a bit about your lineage?”

The little boy stepped up and smiled brilliantly. “My full name is Severus Duncan Snape the Sixth. I was named in the same manner as the last five first born sons of the Snape family because both of my father’s are traditional men and Dad insisted on it even though my father really didn’t want to…”

For the first time in his life, Severus Snape panicked. He felt as though he could not get enough air. His breath was coming in shallow gasps and he quickly began to hyperventilate. Harry grabbed his arm and eased him into a chair that appeared. “Sev…Sev…SEV!”

Harry gently patted the older man on the cheek and made him look at him. “You’ll pass out if you don’t get control of your breathing Sev,” Harry whispered.

As he gradually came back to the present and slowed his breathing, Severus looked at Harry. He wore the same kind expression that he’d worn every time Snape had come through the door. “How?” He croaked at the younger man.

Kneeling and taking his hands, Harry answered, “I think that when you fed me your magic at the last battle is when it happened. Sev, you know just as well as I do that wizard’s can get pregnant. I believe this happened because of the level of trust I have in you. When you fed me your magic, the perfect love, and the perfect trust I have in you caused a small part of yours to combine with a small part of mine and Duncan was created. The reason that wizard births are so uncommon is because the level of love and trust must be perfect between the two. You know these things. And yes, Sev, I do love you. I love you with my whole being. This isn’t exactly how I planned on telling you, but, I suppose it will have to do.”

Snape was still dazed by the news. He only heard the last two sentences Harry said. “I…you love me? Harry, I’ve never wanted children. I…” He broke off the last statement and reflected back on his awful childhood.

“My childhood was shit, too, Sev. And, if you do not want anything to do with this child, I completely understand. I’m carrying a child that you never wanted. I’ve got plenty of resources to raise a child and show it the love neither of us ever got. You don’t have to do a thing.”

Tears were coursing down Harry’s cheeks as he made this declaration. As much as he wanted this child, he knew that Severus would turn a cold shoulder to him and it. It didn’t matter much to Harry, though, because he’d have a family.

Severus looked at Harry. He wiped the tear stains from the younger man’s cheek with his thumb. “This is too much. I…With the Dark Lord outside of here, now this? I really need time to think.”

Harry pulled him into a tight embrace. “Do what you have to. Duncan will live a life full of happiness and love no matter what.”

Snape hugged him back and simply shook his head. He let the young wizard go and hurried out of the door. It was not long before he was back in the infirmary. “Poppy, I think we’ve got a bit of a complication.”

The medi-witch looked at Snape. “What do you mean?”

He sighed. “I need you to tell me how far along Harry is. Apparently, he got pregnant during the final battle. I…” Snape began to sob. “He’s carrying my child.”

The older man collapsed at the side of the bed. “The Dark Lord is in his head and he’s…he’s…” Snape’s sobs became wails as Poppy stood there in shock. Her trance broke and she grabbed a calming draught and forced the distraught man to drink it. She guided him to the bed next to Harry’s and made him lay down.

“Severus, dear, you just lie down for a bit. There’s no reason for you to get worked up like this. Everything will work out just fine. Now, let me see what I can find out about Harry. We may have to up his nutrient potions if what you suspect is true.”

Poppy ran a few tests and discovered that Harry was indeed pregnant. She also discovered that he was about seven weeks along. She relayed the information to Snape and he began to cry again, though these tears fell without as much as a whimper. She hugged him and rubbed his back in a motherly fashion. “You know it’s normal to be terrified when facing having your first child, don’t you?”

He groaned at this question and blew his nose. “It’s…Poppy, I never wanted children. It’s…I…” he started weeping again. “Please don’t say anything to anyone.”

“You know I won’t Severus. It’s against my oath as a medi-witch.”

Several hours later, Severus schooled his face to his usual mask of indifference. He made his way to Grimmauld Place and the meeting of the Order. All eyes trained on him as he swept into the room. Everyone wanted to know anything about Harry’s condition and any new developments. Dumbledore started the meeting by telling everyone that Harry was indeed well. He explained what Snape did and that Harry had given him messages so that there would be no doubt as to if it were him. “He also gave us some disheartening information,” Dumbledore continued. “Severus would not say unless it was in front of the whole order, so at this time, I’ll let him speak.”

Snape glared at everyone and took a sip of tea. “I did indeed speak with Harry today. What he told me was not good news. It seems that when he destroyed the Dark Lord’s body, he took up residence in Harry’s mind. Harry has barricaded himself into a corner of his mind, and he is indeed fine, but we must work to find a way to get Riddle out. I need each and every one of you to find anything you can on magical bonds. He feels that if he can sever the bond, he can push the Dark Lord out and he will be gone for good. And, to add insult to injury, Potter has managed to get himself pregnant, so we only have seven or eight months to do this.”

Everyone in the room sat there with their mouth open. The first shock was when Snape called Harry, ‘Harry’, and the second was his last admission. Remus was the first to speak up. “Severus can’t wizards only get pregnant in they love their partner completely and trust them implicitly?”

Snape growled. “It seems so.”

Remus looked at the women across from him. Molly and Tonks had tears in their eyes and Hermione had a goofy grin on her face. The werewolf couldn’t contain his joy. He broke out in a grin that threatened to split his face in half. “I wonder who the lucky bloke is.”

Molly was mortified at Harry was gay, but at the same time, she knew that the love there had to be perfect. Tonks and Hermione sighed happily. Ron sat there dumbly. “Harry’s queer?”

Hermione slapped his arm. “Yes, Ron, he’s queer. Like you couldn’t…Oh, never mind.” Hermione rolled her eyes and looked at Tonks.

The young auror grinned. “I wonder what his type is.”

Hermione giggled along with Tonks. Ron still had a dumb look on his face. “Harry’s gay?”

Hermione roughly pulled Ron’s face toward hers. “Ron, read my lips, Harry’s a big, gay, homo. He’s queer. He’s a pouf. He likes to…”

At this point what Hermione was saying sunk in and Ron looked at her, mortified, and put his fingers in his ears and shouted, “LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!”

Satisfied that she made her point, she smirked at her boyfriend. It wasn’t long before he took his fingers from his ears and looked at her. Hermione looked toward Snape. “Where would be the best place to get books on magical bonds?”

Snape shrugged. “I’ll get the ones from Hogwarts and leave them in the infirmary. I’ve also got a couple in my personal library. I have a feeling that I’ll need to get a couple from elsewhere.”

With this, he got up and swept out of the door. He held his composure for as long as he could. Snape apparated back to Hogwarts and stalked to his room. He fell onto his couch and cried. He cried for the life he’d lost. He cried for the family he didn’t want. Most of all, he cried because he knew that no matter what he was eternally bound to Harry Potter and that frightened him.

Severus was not scared of anything. He never had been. He was terrified that he’d not find a way to rid Harry’s body of Voldemort in time. Snape was shaken out of his thoughts by a knock on his door. He hoped that if he didn’t answer it the person would go away. “Severus,” said a soft voice from the other side of the door.

He leapt up from the couch and wrenched the door open. “Poppy, what’s wrong?”

The older witch smiled as she walked in. “Nothing is wrong dear. I just wanted to make sure that you are ok. Maybe you should stay in the infirmary tonight.”

He scoffed at the suggestion. “I am not ill and I am perfectly capable of caring for myself. Now, if you’ll please just let me be.”

She looked the potions master up and down. “You are so well that you are in a self imposed exile down here, huh? You’ve broken down three times today and I’ve known you for twenty years and never seen you so much as bat an eye at any situation that would cause most men to turn into blubbering idiots! If you won’t accept my help, at least drink some dreamless sleep tonight.”

He glared at the witch. He knew what she was saying was true and he’d never admit it. He growled, “Fine, I’ll take some dreamless sleep.”

Poppy smiled and patted the tall man on the arm. “You know where I’ll be if you need anything, Severus. I mean that.”

She bustled out of the room shaking her head, as she did so many times when it came to that stubborn man. Severus walked over to an ebony cabinet and opened it. He pulled out a decanter of Absinthe and poured himself a glass. He never drank unless he needed to slow everything down. He’d been given a heap of information to go through today and he really, really needed to slow everything down.

Severus pulled down a couple of books about magical bonds and kicked his boots off. He pulled his outer robe off and padded to his chair in front of the fire. He sat down heavily and unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt, getting comfortable. He felt that there was no use in sitting and wallowing in pity when there was work to do. He drank glass after glass of the liquor and read until daylight. Dumbledore opened the door to his quarters and found him with an empty glass and the books spread out in his lap. He looked at the older man and waved him in.

“Severus my boy have you been up all night?”

Snape opened his mouth to answer, but only managed to belch. Dumbledore was taken aback at the drunkenness of his potions master. “Excuse me,” he slurred. “What are you doing here, Dumblee? Isn’t it past your bed time?”

Dumbledore shook his head at the young man. “Severus, it’s breakfast time. Apparently you’ve been up all night drinking. What’s wrong?”

His usually stony face was full of emotion when he said, “The child is mine. I don’t know what to do. He’s my child.”

Dumbledore acted surprised at this remark, but his blue eyes twinkled with joy. “Your child? Severus that’s wonderful news! And it’s all the more reason to work with haste to get Harry up and conscious.”

Terror and sadness crept across the younger wizard’s features. “I don’t know anything about a child. Dumblee you know I don’t like Potter much, either.”

Dumbledore sat on the leather sofa and faced the other man. “You know as well as I do that a child born of a wizard requires that perfect love and trust to go both ways. You need some time to work a few things out. I’ll take these books and give them to Tonks. You just go to bed and shower and meet with me after dinner.”

Severus stretched and heard his knees pop. He sat curled up in his chair all night. He did as Dumbledore suggested and staggered to his room where he fell on his bed asleep immediately. The old wizard shook his head and spelled the drunken man’s clothes off and covered him with the duvet. He gathered up the books and left him a parchment that read:

I’ve spelled your liquor cabinet locked. You need to keep a clear head until this is settled.

At about 3PM Snape finally woke and groaned at the headache he now had. He reached over to his bedside table and grabbed the bubble gum pink potion, downing it in one gulp. “I really should try to make that shit taste better,” he said with a grimace as he let the hangover potion do its work.

He showered and dressed and decided that he’d go ahead and make his way up to Albus’ office. He mumbled the password and the gargoyle jumped out of the way. He waited as the spiral staircase came up to the large door to Dumbledore’s office. The door opened before he had a chance to knock.

“Come in my boy! Tea?”

“No, I’d like to tell you everything that I know about Potter’s situation.”

Dumbledore smiled fondly at the younger wizard. “I believe you told me everything that I needed to know this morning at breakfast time.”

Snape groaned only barely remembering the exchange of words between them. “I was obviously inebriated this morning. Answer me this, I didn’t call you Albus, did I?”

The Headmaster chuckled. “No Severus, I think you called me ‘Dumblee’.”

Snape groaned again and put his hand on his forehead. After a few moments, Dumbledore asked, “Did you find anything of value in your reading last night?”

Shaking his head, the dark man answered, “No, and I fear that we won’t. I keep thinking there’s something we are missing. I need to talk to Potter and see if he has any ideas.”

Albus shook his head. “That is a good idea my boy.”


A/N2: So, here\'s chapter one! Hope you guys like it and I get lots of reviews!! Muah! I\'ve got the bestest readers!