This story had so many twists and turns, I was mad, sad, upset...hot!!!! I hated Severus, I loved Hermione, then I would love Severus and cry for Hermione.
From wirewoolly on May 17, 2018
Hello, this is my first ever review on this site - I registered specially to make it :)
I've read your story twice in the last couple of months, it has so moved me. The only bit I haven't enjoyed is that when I look away from the screen, I don't have your Snape in my home waiting to look after me / teach me a lesson ;)
Seriously, though, reading your words has really helped with my personal growth and sense of identity after a lifelong battle with being a pushover for abusive fucks. I mean, I was on the road anyway (I'm a counsellor now so have worked through enough to be able to help others while maintaining my own sanity. Mostly), but in my most recent post-unhealthy-relationship-healing process (which has been extensive due to having to manage shared childcare with said boundary-pusher) I've been trying to figure out the fine balance of my desire for being controlled by Snape-types and my needs for being nurtured, plus the dynamics of caring for someone else without assuming the role of sole emotional-weight-bearing-vessel.
Every twist and turn of your characters' emotional development has challenged my own and helped me to learn about myself. As I say, the only difficulty I had was the post-story grieving over this perfect coupling - but that again leads me to question why it was perfect to me, and how I can go about looking for the things I need and desire IRL.
I read that you were going through a pretty shitty time of it yourself during the writing of this story and I hope that you're in a better place now. And I'm so glad that if writing this was your crutch/outlet/distraction through all that, it has also been such a gift to your readers. I'm judging that to have considered all the complex emotional dynamics in this story, you must not only be a great writer and story-teller but also a pretty cool person :D
Take care,
wirewoolly xx
This was so intense. I cannot handle it. I loved it.
This was an excellent journey. Sad to see it go, but great story. Hope to see new stories in the future.
THANK YOU Thank you THANK YOU. Oh, I'm am so relieved for this HEA. So grateful for this story. Well done you on writing something so beautiful!!!!!
Yeeeeeeeeeeees! Oh gods, this was so good. This is definitely my favorite of all your stories (sorry ITH).
The ending was perfect. I loved the conversation between Snape and Hermione’s mom, as it was relevant to not only the characters involved, but to the reader as well. The open end of the section before (in his rooms) left me wondering if the scene that followed was real or imagined (or an obliviated dementia). But in the end, as with life, reality is subjective and not as stable as we’d like to believe. The moments of joy and gratitude are what linger, and the present is all we can count on.
My favorite line was “But how did one live as the opposite—an emotional gourmand?”. It captures Snape’s journey (and Hermione’s) so beautifully and throws the spotlight on embracing life rather than running from it. Of course everyone tries to avoid pain, and subsequently runs from that which hurts us, but there is the possibility of embracing all that befalls us, good or bad, and celebrating the ups and downs as the grand buffet of life. Although I can’t claim to live so freely, I can see the pleasure in adopting such an open attitude. There can be pleasure in the pain if the pain is embraced. (As both Hermione and Severus have shown us.)
I also liked “There is a sensation . . . of knowing . . . that comes naturally with our thoughts. It gives us confidence to trust ourselves. When that has been compromised, it can be challenging for that trust to be restored.” I found this poignant for myself as my trust in my thoughts is damaged at best, and it’s caused me to also mistrust the world around me. I think that’s what I find so debilitating about anxiety and depression—the loss of trust in my brain and body and the consequent hatred toward myself for that betrayal. (If I was another person, I’d never speak to myself again. I’m quite the grudge-holder.)
And that’s why I like this story so much; it’s a mirror of my own life . . . even if I don’t always like what I see in the reflection. It’s nice to know I can take the painful with the joyous with equal aplomb when it‘s presented in story form. :) Perhaps one day, like Hermione, I’ll see my own life as a story and be equally ravenous for each new chapter. <3 <3 <3
I loved this chapter! Seeing Hermione embrace the yang side of their dynamic with the whip was brilliant. You captured the balance of her simultaneous give and take so wonderfully.
And even though I was too caught up in the reading to save a boatload of examples, the writing was excellent. The whole thing. <3
The part about her fighting for what she wants and her realization that she had lost that part of herself but had found it again through his “intervention” was brilliant.
And I wondered when you were going to come back to Snape’s earlier comments about competing bucks in both her holes. (I just couldn’t figure out how that was going to be applicable to the story.)
Her declaration of love and his reaction were also fabulous. So sweet. She’s taking control (in so many ways), and he’s going to have to let her remain at the helm to get them back to shore safely. I can’t wait to see how she pulls them out of this shit storm. :)
Fav parts (and one fix):
Was that why he had sacrificed himself? Was this an attempt to undermine his own attachment . . . to her?—Yeeeees!
It was so pure that when she finally gathered to come, it wasn’t the unholy wail that she might have expected but a breathy sigh of exaltation that flowed from her throughout her deliverance—Love the seamless blend of physical into spiritual here.
(It made her so angry that a man like he should think so little of himself.—I’m 99% sure it’s “a man like him”. I wish I knew how to diagram sentences better, but I’m pretty sure in this instance, it’s the object not the subject.)
I’m so excited that we’ll have this whole story soon! I need resolution! :)
Noooooo, you can’t end there! We’re so close!
Are they going to run away together? Don’t answer that :)
This is a shitty review; I’m trying to work on my own chapters, and I my brain won’t switch over to analyze this.
I loved the scene you set here; the description of Snape in his chair was brilliant. Despondent perfection. And Hermione is the quintessential yin to his yang, all vitality and passion to his insular self-denial.
I need more!
I have returned over and over to your story, it has entrenched itself in my memory... which speaks to the power of your writing. I say this due to the fact that I have been tested by multiple doctors and found to have no short term memory, after the various vehicle accidents where I was hit. Your stories linger in my thoughts, an enormous talent which is truly rare. Thank you.
Many others have already covered the details that make this story striking in its intensity, thus I will not parrot the intelligence of your reviewers. The only thing I will say, whether it be parroting or not, is that I deeply hope and wish for a HEA for Severus and Hermione. I understand the depths of the darkness you have plunged them through, they both Need the healing intrinsic to their blooming relationship... sometimes the simplicity of another human to share love is the best balm for the soul. I speak from some experience, though no where near what they have faced in any of the Potterverse / fanfic world.
Also, I wish to offer you my empathy for your loss, 25 years is truly incredible in this modern age. I am glad you have trusted ones to be your support structure, and I have faith that they can be more present for you than this simple stranger. Sincerely hope your writing fills you with the same strength as it does those of us who love your work. You inspire me to push through my issues, and to never give up. Best wishes to you DS.
I had a fantastic time.
Just a quick note, the job found me in Vienna so now I'm working like a maniac to make up the travel time I lost (no rest for the weary, as it seems). But now I'm working with addition of stiff neck (and pain that goes with it) and fever >.<
Through the whole story, I had a small and distant feeling like all of it is...real and not real at the same time. Like she is dreaming - and I was waiting for the moment for her to wake up somewhere. This chapter just enhanced this feeling.
All in all great chapter!
And please, please tell me this story will have "happy end". I'm not sure I could take sad end... (I can but....) ... Between my story, how tired I still am and work I have to do, I have high hopes that your story won't be a sad one. I need hope ;)