rate_review Reviews

Oh fuck is absolutely correct, what in the hell? Man I feel so bad for him... I hope there's no triangle here. Triangles hurt my brain (I'm so sick of trig being merged into Calculus) but .....I'm still stuck on the polyjuicing a friend... that friend needs a medal -swt drop-

Holy crap. Lynch is nuts. Understandably nuts, but nuts all the same. You're right this does all make more sense now. I feel bad for him, but geez, what guilt trip for Hermione. I'm sure she can turn him down without hurting him, but I wonder how they could ever work together after all that. I have had this idea about how I want this story to end for a long time now (but I never say it because I don't want to influence what you have planned). But now I'm wondering how you might be planning to conclude this. So many possibilities. (“She’s beautiful isn’t she?”--Comma between beautiful and isn't.) And now I'm working this all out of order. I'll go back to the start. I loved the whole hand-rubbing scene between her and Shaun. Very sweet. I thought for sure when she had him throw the rock in water there was going to be some connection to ripples, but I like what you/Hermione did a lot better. Much more physical than just words. Your scene setting with George was great. Mushy leaves for a sad conversation. It seems like emotional revelations happen at the Bath a lot. (Come to think of it, it seems like she always talks to Shaun near the water.) I guess I didn't expect George and Luna to be getting it on what with her all burned up, but now I don't know if they're doing anything at all. Luna needs some play. He can still lick her clit, can't he? That doesn't require a lot of contact. And maybe her lips and hands are too burned to do much to him, but I'm thinking George might be willing to hold off on his own pleasure until she's better (or maybe let her direct his masturbation so he can come without hurting her). I am way too into this pairing, aren't I? I'm putting more thought into them than Snape and Hermione. I was so fucking confused when you said "Percy told us that he desperately tried to cling on to life." I thought you talking about Percy dying but somehow telling them about his own attempt to cling to life. I didn't catch on till the next paragraph when he said "He was my twin." Then I figured out he was talking about Fred. You might want to change that first he after Percy to Fred to help out the slow people like me who didn't cotton on to the the significance of the preceding paragraph on the first read. There was a lot of info in this chapter. I like that. I think this is the first chapter where Snape is barely mentioned. Hermione is becoming her own woman. A new improved model thanks to Snape's influence. I'll keep my eyes peeled for that next update.

Time to play catch up for me. Ok. What a twist with Luna' s stalker. I love a powerful, strong, Severus. It gets the juices flowing for me. +wink+ I had that feeling Lynch was involved in the interaction between them. I started feeling that just recently but I'm sure you planned that for me. So glad she's honest about her feelings for him. I think in his situation she needs to be. I can't wait to read more! Love the flow. Not to fast or slow and just enough smut. More good things for Sev and Hermione please.

Dang it! You just had to whip that next chapter out before I could finish my review for the other one. I feel like I Love Lucy trying to catch the chocolates off the conveyor belt. But I'll never turn down a new chapter, so don't take that as a complaint. Back to 17. Luna is truly otherworldly. I don't know if I could ever forgive the person who burned me up (or it would at least take a damn long time). And she's thinking about how to help him, which is what I think Luna would do ; but it is so far removed from I would do that I'm in awe of her reasoning. Once again, I wish I knew Luna in real life. And the sunflower revelation was great. The discussion between the staff was very interesting. George seems pretty pissed at Shaun on Luna's behalf (even if he still wants to help Shaun). And his "close is relative" line was VERY interesting. I'm not sure if that was a dig about Lynch's attraction to Hermione, or if he was hinting at another connection. Perhaps the one that Snape reveals later. Or Ellory. She's the broken one now, so I'm guessing Lynch is all over that. And then there's the moment of commiseration between Ellory and Hermione. I still don't know what's going on with her, but it obviously meant a great deal to her that Hermione would say something supportive in her favor. Then we move on to the discussion between Hermione and Snape. I think the line that sticks with me most was "Do you need me to appreciate you?" So much could be read into that. First off, yes, she does need him to appreciate her. But secondly, I think he wants her to need him. And that answer might make him happy or freak him out. Or both. I liked him tapping on her leg as they talked too. That's just a small thing, but it adds a more personal feel to the moment. Arousing but intimate. "She didn’t want him different. She just wanted to understand him."--This is so Hermione. But it's also very open for her. She's not judging him (as she would have at the start of the story). Fossicking--I love this. Word notebook. About as fun as a bout of boils. Hahahahaha! On the bed. (Yes, sir.) I loved this whole bit. About his mouth hanging open after he says it and then when he repeats it. Hotness. "Was that the nature of the Dominant-submissive relationship? That the power play could redraw the lines, anew, each time?"--That's an interesting question. I think I need to think about it longer. I love when he makes the toy for her. That's the kind of thoughtfulness I want in a man. And the part about him pointing out her pussy's desire to be filled was excellent. As I said in my email, I loved the claw. And they way he used it on her was masterful. The directions followed by the bombardment and then the internal expansion--fabulous. And then we end on such a promising note of pleasures yet to come. I'll be back to review 18 after I ride my bike. Don't post anything in the meantime :)

I like this continuation of the scene. There's kind of balance between them this way. She submits, he submits. She lets go a little, he loosens his tongue a little. I thought the claw was a bit impersonal after the intimacy of their last "session" (not that that made me love the god ol' FC any less), but you've countered it with this intimate conversation between them. (BTW, it's chafed not chaffed, unless there's some weird Britspelling the dictionary is hiding from me.) The whole conversation was great. Snape's kind of reluctantly hopeful, accusing her of just caring out of sympathy. Hermione's pretty honest, but in this story, that's a big deal. It's taken her all this time to tell herself the truth. And then Snape tries to play off his attraction as mere lust. As if. I think he was trying to establish some distance between them because he was afraid she was the one person who might have the tenacity to pick away at his walls and eventually dismantle them. I'm perplexed by Lynch's offer. Does he not know Hermione at all? Why would he think that she would want a married man? Even if she did, she would never tell anyone, especially not Snape or Lynch. "I fucked my case manager and had to erase her memories. I might have removed a few extras while I was at it. I like my privacy."--Hahahahaha! That's my kind of man. Private pervert. I also think I need to get my hands on Snape's "toolkit." (Or maybe just his tool.) Sounds like a pocket full of fun to me. I definitely would have checked the other pocket. Hermione needs all the warning she can get. (Now I can't stop singing "I got a pocket, got a pocket full of sunshine. I got a love and I know that's all mine. Oh. Ohohoh.") Obviously I love Hermione's newfound love of proctology. And the trust involved from Snape is huge. The whole scene was super hot and made me want to find a willing prostate to accost. Fuck me, Merlin cracked me up. I need to start saying that. (Fuck me Merlin, it's cold out here.) I love how she always makes a show out of consuming his seed. Constant proof that she wants every part of him. Hahahahaha! I didn't really come up with wank bank. I had the phrase spank bank in my head from a movie when I wrote TMG, I just altered it to be more British.

Shut up! That has to be the biggest major confession EVER! What?! Quit blowing my mind at the end of these chapters. Oh my god, so just kidding, don't you ever stop! That was so good. Why do I feel like I need that proverbial cigarette after really good sex after reading your chapters? It's that good! I love how she comforts him not just by holding him or the really hot sex but at the end when she told tells him that she's not going anywhere, that gave me goosebumps. Awwww. Until next time....

Aww! He's finally beginning to open up to her and trust her. This chapter was lovely. I liked it very much.

Fantastic story, keep writing!

You leave me breathless again. Who would have thought it! Can't wait to read more!

OMG! Such a good chapter. Opening scene with Lynch was quite touching, and we get to see that Hermione is indeed a better therapist now that Snape has fucked some sense into her. Lynch's history is great (well, not for him). It makes the whole background of the retreat more meaningful. The idea of him fighting his fears with actual physical strength is wonderful. Oh, I just got it. Lynch is attached to Hermione because she's so broken. It isn't sexual. It's about protection. He wants to help her. Now that Snape is turning her into a stronger version of herself, the thrill is waning. I don't know about Ellory, but George is "wounded" much like Hermione. Does Lynch only hire people he feels he can protect in some way. I'm still trying to figure out what's going on with Ellory. At first I thought she might be discussing leaving the retreat, but now I suspect she has some kind of problem that appeals to Lynch's sheltering instincts. And if Snape knows what happened to Lynch's family, there might be an unspoken connection between the two. They both lost their first love and the chance at a happy family. They're probably similar in their need to latch on to people who they can help while still maintaining some distance. They both want to protect. And now we have Snape's formative secret. I love the whole scene with her hugging him in the hall. Instead of going at his pain professionally, she approaches him intuitively, using care to shatter the remaining walls around him. But he lets her do it, which is equally important. "The kiss was not passionate, nor was it tentative, it was a kiss of open neediness and she responded immediately by opening her mouth to him."—Reinforcing her openness to him no matter what state he's in, accepting him cracks and all. "She licked and nipped at him in encouragement but held back the full extent of her desire, wanting his to take precedence. "—They've reversed their rolls from the first sexual session. "She wasn’t averse to fucking on the chairs but she also wanted to ensure that he had the room to do what he needed to."—She's so different now. She never would have even considered such a thing when they started. (Nor would she have been snogging him in the hall for all to see.) And the sex was poignantly intimate. And I forgot to say this in the previous piano chapters, but it's not just Hermione's language that's changing, your sexual descriptions are also becoming less clinical and more sensual as they open up. You tricky tricky wordsmith. That's brilliant. There were so many excellent descriptions in here, I'm sure I'm missing a bunch, but I particularly liked "She wasn’t averse to fucking on the chairs but she also wanted to ensure that he had the room to do what he needed to.-- It was as if her core was oscillating on the fulcrum of his cock and with his black eyes penetrating hers, she felt herself being profoundly impaled from both ends.--while her pussy sucked at his unrelenting dick with each flexion of her hips. “That’s . . . most . . . compelling . . . Dr Granger.” His normally flawless baritone, wavered as he squeezed the words out between thrusts.--The keening moans that rose from her chest turned intermittently tremulous each time he bottomed out inside her.--hooking both hands under her cheeks and thrusting deeply into her, their bodies pressed tightly together, eyes fused.--The stretching of time around her release made her mouth fall open" I also found her integration of his past lessons lovely "At that point she was willing to let him take her however he wished. But, despite the comforting lightness that came with giving over control,"—She's seen that she has to let go to experience all sex has to offer. The intimacy and care expressed in both the sex and the aftermath was an excellent bridge for Snape's burgeoning trust. Hermione finds peace in that closeness, but Snape finds freedom. He's got his own loss of control to come to grips with. While finding out Snape's reasons for his actions was meaningful and satisfying, I thought the more important breakthrough was that he told her at all. It isn't necessarily all the horrible things in his past that kept him a prisoner to their influence, it was that he kept it all to himself. (Which I am guilty of as well, but no one's ever fucked the trust into me.) He ultimately let Voldemort win by allowing the fear to dismantle his personal life. (Which was lifesaving when Voldemort was alive, but a mortal blow to Snape once he was gone.) As always I can't wait for what happens next. How many more chapters are you estimating?