rate_review Reviews

I am sorry I haven't replied until now, but I have to thank you for the out loud guffaws!! This has been so twisted and hysterical. Thank you and I do look forward to his reaction to her machinations. I knew she wasn't stupid. lol HG4eva

Holy shit!!! That was amazing! I can't believe the twist you just pulled there I never saw it coming!!! I've never been so surprised by a twist in all my life and let me tell you I read a lot. You're a god damn genius! I wasn't sure about reading this but I love a good snape-hermoine fic now and again and omg I am not dissapointed.

Where to begin??!! Love your story so far. I was a little iffy about Snape in drag but I kept reading and then I was hooked. Somewhere around Snape slapping his hand down like a Greco-Roman wrestler afraid to turn over. LOL!!! Then the most innocent line ever..."What sort of hand cream do you use?" OMG. Hilarious. I love the way your story can meld humor and serious subjects together. Cause let's face it, either Hermione knows or she has some issues herself with almost being a little "rapey" humping a "lady" that she's only met with a few times and the person never talks, she's never seen her face, and surprise suddenly has a penis! I think your doing a great job with this story. I can't wait to read more.

Where to begin??!! Love your story so far. I was a little iffy about Snape in drag but I kept reading and then I was hooked. Somewhere around Snape slapping his hand down like a Greco-Roman wrestler afraid to turn over. LOL!!! Then the most innocent line ever..."What sort of hand cream do you use?" OMG. Hilarious. I love the way your story can meld humor and serious subjects together. Cause let's face it, either Hermione knows or she has some issues herself with almost being a little "rapey" humping a "lady" that she's only met with a few times and the person never talks, she's never seen her face, and surprise suddenly has a penis! I think your doing a great job with this story. I can't wait to read more.

Oh well, I admit defeat. On day a week for leisure reading must be allowed. And haven't you been buisy this week? I read the first chapter and just thought, hilarious idea! Second and thrid reminded me of that scene from Wicked "Oh, that's my sister. She's tragically beautiful. And I'm the beautifully tragic one." Then I came to the (currently) last chapter and the world just turned upside down. Now we're at "Alice in Wonderland"-bizarre moments. Really, it gets "Curioser and curioser". Not complaining, but it begs the question just how far this will go without her knowing his identity. Taking her natural curiosity into account, I'd say, not very far. Still, as much as I never would have guessed this as your next theme, I find this one rather enjoyable to read. :)

Godammit, you're fast! I got like half a page of my new story written yesterday. Maybe I'll be more inspired today. Great beginning to this chapter. Lovely trickiness. "...without his mind needing to snap-kick him in the balls?"—Hahahahaha! "There was a certain cock within earshot that might take that as an invitation to jump into any one of her orifices and shake itself up until it exploded."—Oh god, that was great. "Even as his cock nodded its head, Severus shook his."—Shit. I just snorted my sinuses clear. "popping up like a whac-a-mole "—Bwhahahahaha! Perfect. "He couldn’t stoop any lower if he had had his nuts stapled to his nipples."—Self-depreciation at its most hilarious. "If she revealed a wart on her elbow he would probably spray his stockings." You're killing me. "Drive her nuts? He was pretty sure that had already happened. Although in no position, himself, to comment on creepiness, he suddenly had an urgent need to check the stove to see whether she happened to have any bunnies on the boil."—This might be my favorite line. I like the whole selection, but the fatal attraction bunny boiling was masterful. "They were both punishing themselves with their obsessions, struggling to maintain relationships and clinging to delusions to, ironically, keep sane."—And you say I'm the one who uses universal truths. You've done it several times in this story/chapter. "That it is there, somewhere, in the detail. The finest of detail. And if I can only look hard enough. Be open enough. I will be gifted the secrets. I will see them. And capture them.”—Gee, I don't know anyone like this (cough-DS-cough). "Straddling his waist, she quickly wiped her damp face with her hands."—WTF, Hermione's an art-crazed rapist. But I'm not too far off, so no judgement from me :) "Fuck. She must have been studying sex like it was her N.E.W.T.s."—That's how you get lots of Os. (Bu-dum ching!) "..cranking the blood back into it with each stroke until it was fully engorged and her lips were stretched wide"—Loved this description. Cranking was an excellent word choice. "...wishing he could lick the arousal right out of her. Admittedly, that would be difficult through a veil."—Hot and hilarious. "He continued his heavily lubricated pistoning, their juices melting together around him, until he was drained."—Grape Juice (blending...I get it now). "...desperately clinging on to unreality."—Don't we all. Your insanity is addicting. Can't wait for the next chapter.

Some clarification is needed: I have spent most of the last 7 years on career and husband, in that order. I came back to the site around the time you started The Quickening. Been out of the loop for a while. I might've made an undignified happy sound when I saw you answered me. As a final aside before, you know, the actual review--I have sent an email to support to see if my pen name can be resurrected but I remember literally none of my log on info other than that. Eventually I will have one, even if it's not the one I started out with, hence the name I'm reviewing under. (I was never that fond of my original pen name, which is what happens, I suppose, when you leave decisions like that up to random word generators.) Anyway, this chapter. Wow. Weirdest smut I've ever read. Like I didn't think it could make me laugh out loud, and you have challenged my preconceived notions. Also I seriously love this Hermione. She's perfect. So your writing is incredible. I usually have to read a chapter more than once in order to catch all the detail. So Severus has gotten in Hermione's pants, BUT she still doesn't know who he is. This will be interesting to read. Is it going to freak her out and be big drama? I get the feeling that she's pretty accepting and that she'll just go with the flow, knowing what it's like to be rejected because of who you are--thanks to your set up vis a vis the relayed discussion with Ginny. Would like to see her discuss that more in depth, in a situation where he would actually kinda speak. Maybe not too much though since we've seen how much she appreciates it when he just listens.

Holly hell that was HOT!!! Those were some waldos!!! I'm sure once everyone calms down there's gonna be some questions. Oh Severus you've got some 'splaining to do! I can't wait until the next chapter.

I tried a new thing. I wrote down my thoughts as I read rather than just reading through and reviewing when I was done. I was seriously cracking up at that first paragraph! You've got a real talent of drawing readers in with just a few lines. Again laughing at "Then he remembered. He'd run into Neville Longbottom's face." I liked the part about Hermione's touchiness and painting. It made me think, connecting the tactility of her art to her touching people. What similar associations can I make in my own life? Hmm. I think I'm liking where this story is heading. It's both funny and sad though, that Severus is dressing up as a woman to go see Hermione. And I love the internal monologue. It's always enjoyable to listen to a character curse themselves for a stupid decision while they're in the act. "He'd said one word to her-- 'Grape'." I smiled because I didn't realize that he literally only said the one word. Then I laughed because I remember his thoughts afterwards, cursing himself for using a rhyming fruit. I keep waiting for her to notice that he is not a woman. Imagine her surprise when the woman she thinks she's befriended is actually a man in a skirt, and her old professor to boot. Or on the flip side, his mortification and humiliation when he's revealed and she realizes her old professor has been cross-dressing to spend time with her. OR she already knows and he's shocked when he is revealed and she just smiles because she's known all along. Help, I'm thinking too hard. I'm still confused as to how Hermione still doesn't recognize Snape. I'd like to think that if Alan Rickman/Severus Snape ever spoke one word to me (even if I couldn't see his face), I'd know it was him. Especially if he was my teacher for six years or so! She's sober and he's a grown ass man in a skirt with a deep (familiar!) voice and beautiful hands (that she spent a lot of time looking at). She should at least be suspicious.

Yoooo, I don't even know what to say. That dressing room scene made me want to laugh and die of humiliation at the same time. There were some lines that were brilliant, like when you compared Severus's cock in the stockings to a masked bandit, but I think I'm too in shock to pick out any more. The last paragraph/line were of course also great. I have had the same problem many times where my rational mind thought I was an idiot and threatened to leave completely. Severus's rational mind is my favorite part of this story so far, it's fighting him so hard.