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rate_review Reviews

for Deception

by valkyrie136

person A_Diva
schedule October 6, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Good action sequence in the forest. It got my heart racing, lol. I really enjoyed the showdown b/w Lucius and Draco. It was intense.

Great job.

Also, if you like dark romance where women are held captive...go to Good Reads. I randomly ran across a bunch of them one day. I've been meaning to recommend the sight to you, although I'm not sure how you would find them. I guess the search engine.
person A_Diva
schedule October 6, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I am really confused about what happened in chapter 42. I know Narcissa arrived to save Draco, but it was all sort of rushed. That chapter could use fleshing out.


I've liked the story, so far. I do believe that it could have been a little more in-depth all around, but I'm glad for the quick updates.
Thanks
person sherlocked17
schedule October 6, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Swollowed should be swallowed?

I like your angst an poetic qualities.
I do like dark and twisted stuff not sure why, maybe the fantasy is enough, that is why I started writing my own fix. (usually not my habit to plug my own story in a review.)
person Anon
schedule October 6, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I was really looking forward to you killing Ginny off.
Why is it so hard to kill a bitch?
person Ariel
schedule October 6, 2014 at 12:00 AM
That was a weird twist. Giving up children for Ginny? It does make sense with how veelas are obsessed with their one and only.
person ccha
schedule October 6, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Haha love that of him being jealous of his own son.
person magi
schedule October 5, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Yes! Calm but seething on the inside Draco is much scarier than insanely angry Draco.
Now, his Slytherin is showing.
What is he planning.
person A_Diva
schedule October 5, 2014 at 12:00 AM
So Lucius has a secret mate and children. I feel for Ginny, which is who I guess she is. I'm very intrigued. There's some depth in here that I like. I hope you keep digging.
person A_Diva
schedule October 5, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Look at Lucius getting his little bit of heaven on with Ginny. I wonder if Ginny is as pliant as Lucius thinks, or if she's only biding her time. I do like that you're actually capable of writing someone who feels redemption. Lucius did terrible things, but he regrets the actions he took to claim Ginny. I sadly don't think Draco will ever get there. I say Hermione kill him. That's dark. he he.

I know you like dark, but I hope you don't kill of the twins.

person Ariel
schedule October 5, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I am glad you have decided to continue the story like this without making a Part II until later. The plot got thicker. I do enjoy the dark aspects of fanfiction, too. Chapter 32 has gotten me excited. What will she do?