rate_review Reviews

how come harry almost never has the brains to make compulsion charms and confounding charms on a braclet with a muggle notice-me-not on them to get the dursleys to treat him better. he knows what his home life is like so that i would think would be top of the list of things to do with magic. an if you say those spells are too hard for him have him trick the weasley twins or oliver wood into doing it for him.

since harry does have his invisableity cloak he can pretend to got to bed at 9 p.m. and sneak out to an unused classroom and practice magic for 3 hours a night. if it takes 30 minutes to learn a spell he can learn 6 spells a night which is 42 spells a week. now the students at hogwarts seem to only have each class once a week so that would mean they learn one spell per class so 40 spells a year per class. so harry could learn all of 2nd year charms and transfiguration in 2 weeks, and all of 3rd year in 2 more weeks and so on so that in 12 weeks he has learned all that hogwarts teaches in these 2 classes. harry will have those subjects finished before christmas break. he could then search the library and start on defence against the dark arts an finish that off in 6 weeks. an this way he can devote the rest of the school year to potions brewing and finish off that for all the years before summer holiday.

an yes i know you are going to say what about harry's social time? that is what he has weekends for as well as studyhall and the time between the end of dinner and curfew starts. an 3rd year harry would likely take runes and arithmusy an he can knock out those classes during his study time from 9 p.m. to midnight and do them in the commonroom since they are just written work. so the only class that leaves him to worry about is herbology.

as far as potions goes harry should in fact have no problem with that class. if you think about it he has been learning that since he was 4 or 5 years old thanks to his aunt who has forced him to do the cooking. an harry had much worse punishments from his aunt to worry about then a simple detention or loss of house points such as having his hand put in a skillet of hot grease, those were much more life and death punishments.

And now I'm less interested in this story. The vampire meeting ruined it for me. Yes, Harry doesn't need to dominate all the time, however such an unfair encounter so early in the game that forces the protagonist to become a little bitch/pussy...

Also Harry at no point has tried out the save function. Well he might have in the latter half of this chapter, whic hI won't be reading for a long time until I can get over my disgust so as to try this story which had a very good first three chapters before going down the drain faster than you can say "Squeel for me piggy!" once more.

In my rushing down the page so as to let my disapointment known I did notice that apparently a goblin is met. Quite possibly a better sex scene...but if it follows up the complete demasculation of Harry...I could tollerate, and even understand, Harry being mollested. Even the fact that he thought about the finger being uncomfortable. However the moment the prostate was pushed he became...well...I'm more inclined to believe he was swapped with a Yaoi story protagonist.

I hope, sincerely and from the bottom of my heart, that you alter this chapter. Otherwise, after two amazing days of returning to see if this had updated, I'll be left for a long time with disgust at the thought of having read this. It's like my experience with Mass Effect. I loved the games until I got to the end of the third game. Haven't been able to pick it back up and I still have hateful feelings towards the writers.

In short: Harry being molested is fine. Pushing an uncomfortable finger in his ass in an attempt to torture/pleasure him is fine. Having him enjoy it and then becoming a begging little bitch is NOT! Heck, have Harry use the pause function before discovering and using the load-save option so as to return before the event and avoid it...just please, get rid of that scene!!! Harry can lose a fight, but not his...well, his essence. His self. His pride. Whatever you want to call it.

This story has a lot of potential. I love Gameworld Fanfictions, but they easily are railroaded.

Also, I've read a Naruto story similar to this...but it just became ridiculous really fast. This one, however, seems to avoid that trap. As in, the fox girl had some story build up, Ginny already has a two parter, Harry is a bit cautious, and as the moderator/help function just explained, it isn't just consequence-free one-of sex. THat was something the Naruto-themed story didn't get. It just had Naruto fuck each mildly atractive girl and acumulate a ridiculous amount of abilities...which he almost never used...so what was the point?

In this story, Harry is setting himself up for the most efficient EXP gain possible. Now let's just hope the enemy levels are locked and not scaled, so as to be around the player's level (or at least become higher if Harry levels up). After all, he's aranging for himself to socially gain exp, not to really bduke it out.

I cannot praise this story enough. The lemos are very well written, and from what I see you actually think at least a chapter or two ahead. After all, while the fox-girl might be obvious so as to put the fox in a chapter early, you even kept the continuity of Ginny enjoying anal play in. Just that one mention of her requesting a finger up her but in chapter two didn't really matter on itself, but it made the anal sex in chapter three actually seem correct rather than a pubescent boy's fantasy world where each girl enjoys such acts.

Hah, amusing story, very original and very hot. Hope you'll keep updating it.

Really enjoying this! I don't usually like het stories, but the plot makes me want to keep reading. Please keep it up!

The story isn't hot yet, but it could be in the future - they're twelve and it's creepy as fuck that you started so young. I'm just skipping sex scenes until it's less creepy.

That aside, the biggest failing of stories like this is how women only seem to want to have sex with the protagonist - like Harry is the only one with a cock and the only one allowed to sleep around. It makes things less interesting, and the women in the world less respectable.

This a fun read hope there more to come soon.