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July 9, 2015 at 12:00 AM
I really LOVED the first chapter of this story. I always enjoy DomLuna, and Hermione's submission here is so perfect. PLEASE continue this, I would love to see more! :)
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May 1, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Quite a good story,very nice ideas and nice characterisation. Even the little snippets of back story help. My main issue is that, though most of it was well written, some parts were actually a little difficult to read, with speech starting at the end of one line, proceeding a little on the next, then continuing on the line below. Though not terribly vexing, small niggles can really ruin the experience, especially when by simply proofreading these could be so easily fixed. In terms of the actual action, quite strange but not unenjoyable. I'd quite like to see more.
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April 22, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I would like to say I read and enjoyed this, but I can't. You need to reformat the story. There seems to be a line break, or something, after every line, making it very jarring to read.
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April 22, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Wow - didn't expect you to be so right. But the format really was painfully wrong and I'm still not completely happy after redoing it.
Just for the sake: I usually write texts with LaTeX which directly compiles them into .pdf from which I copy it here. Therefore the wonky format. But since I know now it just might not happen again :-)
Just for the sake: I usually write texts with LaTeX which directly compiles them into .pdf from which I copy it here. Therefore the wonky format. But since I know now it just might not happen again :-)