schedule
April 23, 2013 at 12:00 AM
i don't think you were rude or sarcastic. if people don't like what read they can stop and click out of the story. i like people who speak their mind and voice their options so you get an A+ in my book.
i did find asmall thing : Tom now had dark(1)drown hair that reached his shoulders in soft waves.
(1) should that be brown?
other then that small that i do all the time to be honest i cant wait till you update again ! please do it soon :)
i did find asmall thing : Tom now had dark(1)drown hair that reached his shoulders in soft waves.
(1) should that be brown?
other then that small that i do all the time to be honest i cant wait till you update again ! please do it soon :)
schedule
April 23, 2013 at 12:00 AM
A very intriguing start, can't wait to see what's going to happen next, please update chapter 3 soon ^_^
I like the fact that you spoke your mind, so what if there are couple of miss spells? It's only by a letter or so, it's well close enough that we understand, besides even in books there's miss spells from time to times, nothing wrong with that.
I like the fact that you spoke your mind, so what if there are couple of miss spells? It's only by a letter or so, it's well close enough that we understand, besides even in books there's miss spells from time to times, nothing wrong with that.
schedule
April 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
interesting more please
schedule
April 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Give him a hair.... haaaaah... it's funny, cause he's bald.
I think you might mean heir. You have heard of spell check, right?
Also.. Serpentine is not spelled serpintine... like... turpintine. The word is derived from serpents... snakes.. there is no such thing as serpint.
Are you massively impatient and sexually deprived or does writing just not come naturally to you, such that ANY sort of a build up or context is omitted here. Harry suddenly appears before Voldemort bawling with self pity and immediately embraces the idea of the person he hates most licking him and proposing sex... Oh.. and Voldemort suddenly SUGGESTS they share power... because he is just a fairness and power-sharing kind of guy, you know.
I think you might mean heir. You have heard of spell check, right?
Also.. Serpentine is not spelled serpintine... like... turpintine. The word is derived from serpents... snakes.. there is no such thing as serpint.
Are you massively impatient and sexually deprived or does writing just not come naturally to you, such that ANY sort of a build up or context is omitted here. Harry suddenly appears before Voldemort bawling with self pity and immediately embraces the idea of the person he hates most licking him and proposing sex... Oh.. and Voldemort suddenly SUGGESTS they share power... because he is just a fairness and power-sharing kind of guy, you know.
schedule
April 19, 2013 at 12:00 AM
not bad!! Its cute story so far.