AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Alpha

by bookworm810

person Sapphire Phoenix
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I absolutely adore the premise of this story-if only life was so simple as to have a ritual to sort out your preferences! I also like how you gave a similiarity between the headdmaster, the minister and Harry: that is a lovely bit of symmetry. Please do not wait too long to update.
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
what a fascinating approach... and you've explained it all, laying it out clearly so there's very little confusion (though wouldn't the mb's resent being essentially ripped away from their family? unless the parents in Q were obliviated but then what do u do with the kid... especially if the kid had siblings who also showed magic? or is it more a case of essentially moving out early?
how do they keep the kids from knocking each other up if they're going at it like bunnies? do they have counseling or something for those who might have some ingrained hang ups or have kinkier than 'normal' sexual appetites? taking the kid from their parents at 14/ 15 doesn't erase the previous 13/14 years of raising.
at any rate, there were a few typos in both words and names so keep an eye on that. nothing kills a good story faster than bad spelling/grammar.
that being said, this sounds very interesting and i look forward to seeing more.
person Kazumi-sama
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
This is a very interesting story. I can't wait for more.
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Great story! Can't wait for more, update soon please!
person Kain
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Alright....ya got my interest piqued. I'm very interested in seeing a possible Yuri pairing....perhaps Susan and Hermione? ;D

And I believe another reviewer brought it up, but how would a Muggleborn child feel being taken from his or her family? I understand it's for there own good but i doubt anyone would be happy about it.

Awesome start, Mpreg and yaoi isn't usually my thing and i usually stick to yuri but i dabble in reading these types every now and then.
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I almost passed this over as I prefer plot accented with sex rather than the other way around. However, as I was bored, I read it and I'm certainly glad I did. What a great premise and I hope there will be more to the story than reading about a bunch of bunnies. I look forward to seeing what you do with this story. Thanks for writing.
person Seliki
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
I am so excited this is looking so good!! This is looking to be a really great story, I can't wait!!
person despairs
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Typically i'm a Slash reader, i love the Yaoi. And i have a feeling that Harry will be given at least one female mate, not just males. But i'm glad that i read this first chapter, i found it very interesting. Good luck with your story, have fun! =D
person djaddict
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
*Chuckles*

Oh, this is going to be fun!
person Clara
schedule December 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Very nice set up.

People I'd like to see Harry with(dom)are Fleur, Tonks, Sirius, Remus, Kingsley but that's just my opinion.

Please update soon