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July 31, 2015 at 12:00 AM
OMG!!! I'm feeling like a bad fangirl because I'm just finish to read this chapter and I want the next one ^^
Amazing as always Dearie ;-)
Amazing as always Dearie ;-)
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July 30, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Brilliant chapter! It was very emotional. I hope we find out where Severus went.
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July 30, 2015 at 12:00 AM
that was way out there but ok???!!!! and george is loosing it now he wants them to do it in front of others , don't kno man !!!!!! thanks for the update !!!!!
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July 28, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Love this story! I'm interested to see what happens with their 'relationship'! Even how George fits in.
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July 28, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Please please please please update. This story is so great and has totally pulled me in. I can't wait to see how the story and the characters develop
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July 25, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Such and amazing story, you are a great writer. Do you have anything on other sites?
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July 24, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Yay, so glad this has updated. I absolutely love the way you write severus' reaction to the whips. Do keep writing please :)
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July 24, 2015 at 12:00 AM
DARLING, I really can't wait anymore for the next chapter. It's making me restless and anxious not knowing what sticky situation is coming next. Pun intended.
PLEASE find it in your heart to put a poor girl at ease, and thank you for all of the steamy goodness.
Sincerely,
Waiting on the edge of her seat
PLEASE find it in your heart to put a poor girl at ease, and thank you for all of the steamy goodness.
Sincerely,
Waiting on the edge of her seat
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July 23, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Such a good chapter! Love the fact that she finally got under his skin! Please add me to he update emails ldewulfe@aol.com
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July 22, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Hello, I'm the asininely meticulous Anon :) It seems that I have a reputation to live up to now... :P Just to clarify, I didn't mean to be disparaging (or even to do such a close reading) - I noticed a few things then it just snowballed from there...
That being said, I didn't do as close of a reading for this chapter and I think a lot of the problems were fixed as well. There were fewer semicolons, which was great. I think most were used properly but just make sure the two parts of the sentence are complete clauses. Just two I picked up on:
Eg: "But Hermione checked her impulse and waited in the silence; the only sound that filled the room WAS the crackling from the hearth." --> the change in tense makes the second part complete.
Eg: "Hermione could feel her heart racing in her chest, the thundering echoing so loud she was certain he could hear it as well." --> I'd actually change the semicolon to a comma but you could also change the echoing to echoed.
One last thing:
"How would it effect their work with George?" --> Make sure it's affect (verb) not effect (noun)
As always, great job with the characters - I'm glad Hermione and Severus are finally coming together and opening up to each other. I like how Severus is slowly softening but still maintaining his prickly exterior. Also, I marvel at your creativity and how you have come up with so many different toys. Thank you for the quick update and I look forward to reading the next chapter!
That being said, I didn't do as close of a reading for this chapter and I think a lot of the problems were fixed as well. There were fewer semicolons, which was great. I think most were used properly but just make sure the two parts of the sentence are complete clauses. Just two I picked up on:
Eg: "But Hermione checked her impulse and waited in the silence; the only sound that filled the room WAS the crackling from the hearth." --> the change in tense makes the second part complete.
Eg: "Hermione could feel her heart racing in her chest, the thundering echoing so loud she was certain he could hear it as well." --> I'd actually change the semicolon to a comma but you could also change the echoing to echoed.
One last thing:
"How would it effect their work with George?" --> Make sure it's affect (verb) not effect (noun)
As always, great job with the characters - I'm glad Hermione and Severus are finally coming together and opening up to each other. I like how Severus is slowly softening but still maintaining his prickly exterior. Also, I marvel at your creativity and how you have come up with so many different toys. Thank you for the quick update and I look forward to reading the next chapter!