rate_review Reviews

This is an awesome story.  I've really been enjoying it and now I get to the end to find its not finished. I hope you come back to finish this. It's rather refreshing to have a creature story that builds more slowly with actual attention to the plot. I was just starting to fall in love with this world that you've built and i would love to read more. Ill be keeping an eye out so please come back! Good luck and happy writing!

it is just BRILLIANT !!!!!

about #20..

Oookay! Now we iz gettin' somewhere! :-) That was a nice 'interlude'.
Hope you had a nice time on your trip.

Ok. Just so you know, Dumbledore would never allow that to happen to his golden boy. Never would he allow him to go so close to death (without good reason, of course. getting rid of voldemort is one thing, dying from injuries is another) stupid. can't write. your story sucks.

I don't really think you're ready to be writing for an audience. You write with things happening that only you really understand. There are too many holes and jumps that a person can't string from one to another. The purpose of writing to an audience is to allow them to understand the message that you are attempting to compose. Therefore, you have to assume the reader knows very little. You have to give up a certain amount of knowledge. The "oh, harry's friends know" without writing it out doesn't cut it. We're not supposed to assume what happens. Granted, the writer (yourself) should assume that we know the Harry Potter universe. Otherwise, why are we here reading it? But you cannot assume that we understand what's going on in your mind. That's your job to let us know by explaining it.

Ch. 20 is great!

got to be the most blatant set up in history... i wondered about that. i thought they were playing a bit fast n loose with hars health there.
anyway, yay, i'm back and my stupid intermawebs is finally working again. *pouts... I WAS NET DEPRIVED! *shudders.

anyway good luck with your rl endeavors... they sound exhausting.

New chappy, YAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!

this chapter was nice .i like the tought of collin as a mate stories like that are so few. oh can't wait to see harry come more into his dominant side .

@19 oh my god it's been ages since I've then able to read this story!! Loving the new chapters!!! Can't wait for more. Update soon

DB