rate_review Reviews

seem rush

I like where you are going with this. I'm sorry about your family problems, I know what that is like. I can't wait for your next chapter. I also am reading Rise of the Drakens, but I like the differences you have put into your story. Keep up the good work!

First off, the first words out of Malfoy's mouth should've been 'piss off potter' or something like that, but then again I'm not sure in this story how he feels post Voldemort or how much I'm supposed to guess his attitude from the other story. Why is Hermione a giant? I'm confused. And it kinda seems like Harry went off on dumbles for no reason-- yes he has done stuff but you know, establish the character -- don't make me guess or assume everything--- it's harder for me being in the nice dumbles camp myself.
All that said, this is just my honest first chapter reaction-- I plan to read more and see if anything makes more since later. I'm also interested in how the mating happens in a non cooperative dumbles environment.

Update soon!

I for one am enjoying reading your version of Starlight Massacre's, The Rise of the Drakens, and hope you don't let flamers stop you from continuing it. As long as you have the original author's permission and have let the site moderators know so they can take the proper steps to verify it, then I don't see what the problem is with some reviewers. I do think you should probably report the flamers/trolls but then again just ignoring them because they are ignorant and immature is much better. In my eyes, flamers are the same as bullies and you can actually feel sorry for them because they are rather pitiful, aren't they? Good job and don't let flamers bully you.

I like this story not as good as the other one but thqlats simply because you kind of move the story around to fast so we don't get the time to fall in love with your characters like we did in rise of the drakens. If you slowed down your writing style and didn't rush through the character development this story would be made all the better. I love your hermionie she fits almost perfectly in a dom role. :)

Ahhhhh! Clifhanger! Would really like to know what Hermione's inheretance is! Loving this story so please, PLEASE, please update soon!

I just found this story!!!!

When I read the chapter where you listed the possible future mates, I wanted to shout TOM, SEVERUS, and BLAISE; for sure. I think the other three will add some spice.

I can't wait until TOM becomes more involved. I hope it is HOT & STEAMY. Will Tom, Severus, and Blaise be joining Draco, in having additional fun with Hermoine *pleading puppy dog eyes*?

Only one point...Harry needs to stand up to Ron and give him a MAJOR detention. Perferably with Hermoine, who will Kick his Ass.

This story is different than starlight massacres (spelling?), but very good. I like the new pairings with Sev not being so sad. As for the family issues, I understand completely. I am going through similar phases and cycles. Hope everything works out for you. Keep up the good job.

first let me just say i'm aiming for constructive criticism here rather than marshmallow toasters (flames).

I clicked on this cause i love a good dracken story... but so far i'm disappointed. Really, so far this is like a cliff notes version of 'rise of the drackens'... with added severus and unsubtle dumbles. i know the base chappie (which u haven't bothered to use) was put up for adoption and at least three ppl ran with it... but this, i'd be surprised if you don't get called on it for idea pinching... you aren't even very subtle about it. I hope you asked first.

i mean, come on, you're capable of your own ideas... (why the heck would the dursleys bother carting har to japan and dumping him... they had to know wizards would come looking. a bit more explanation of back story couldn't hurt.)Also, what year are har and the others in and is dumbles permitted to make a student a teacher... believe it or not, little details do matter. they help flesh out the story and make it less amateur... which, sadly, this one does right now.

i thought mio was his cover rather than his mate? hang on... is mio dracken too and a dom? you haven't really explained that... at all. since when and how does mio have critta blood. i thought she was supposed to be mb?

also, Sanitarium would have sufficed. it being an old school name for a place to dump crazies off at.

YAY! you did acknowledge her and ROTD... that's alright then.

i mean i can see several of your own ideas in there, they're just not as fleshed out as they could be and i think, need to be to make things a bit clearer. I for one am a bit confused. let me just state. BACK GROUND AND CONTEXT ARE IMPORTANT... well, if you don't want readers to be lost like me.
things like, are remi and siri permanent residents of the castle. where and how mio got her dracken blood. what caused the golden trio split and alienated har from dumbles. etc. get the idea?

on the plus side i'm happy to say either your bata ing skills or your bata are excellent. few to none in the way of typos and grammatical errors. pls do keep that up. nothing kills a story faster then being error ridden... besides wall of text syndrome.

keep trying and kudos for being brave enough to post... (i have stories, i'm just not satisfied enough with them to go through the trouble of putting them out. >> I KNOW i can do better.)