rate_review Reviews

The beginning was promising, however when I got to the moment of Malfoy's collaring... definitely not my cup of tea.

I like it so far, looking forward to seeing where you take it and how you have Harry help out everyone in this time line. One question, what about Draco? If Harry controls Lucius and that timeline's Harry hasn't been born yet, then neither has Draco, so will he still be born? I really hope so. Keep up the good work.

Good writing although I felt like the sex scene could have been a bit more drawn out. Make Lucius beg a bit more...plus I don't think the enslavement potion was really nessesary if Lucius was already practically a slave. Now we won't know if what he does is natural or if its because of the potion :/ Also, I can't believe Harry just blurted all of that out * facepalm* . Wouldn't it have been wiser to slowly win their trust and then tell them? Now they are just going to think he is some lying slytherin :/ I mean if somebody you had never met came up to you and just read your mind and blurted out that one of your oldest friends is going to betray you, I wouldn't trust them at ALL. Good idea and decent writing but you just put at least 10 chapters of story into one...

interesting moe please.