AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Hermione's Secret

by Chey-Love

person Mia
schedule November 8, 2012 at 12:00 AM
It would be a better story if it wasn't all talking but had some description in it. Talking is not all it should be. Also you should do some research into Hermione's character as well as Blaise there's a lot you should think about.
person Sera21
schedule March 5, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Firstly, I thought this was going to be a cool double personality story because your summary says that Hermiones secret is that " Hermione is Blaise Zambini" but apparently you just forgot a word :/ A pity. How cool would it be if somebody wrote a story in which Hermione has been using the time turner to be two different people! Instead you wrote 10 sentences or something. Is that supposed to get us excited?? Theres not even anything exciting happening that makes me want to read the next chapter! No dragon, no dementor escape, no forced marriage, nothing. All we know after the first chapter is that they have to be lab partners. How terrible. If I were you I would seriously consider just writing the first chapter over. Many people judge the story( like me) on what the first chapter is like and this first chapter is not just extremly short its also pretty boring.
schedule March 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
okay, I'll bite...I like this pairing so let's see what this is about...