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March 8, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I
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March 8, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Fantastic story. I didn't think anyone could do the original justice but you blew me away i really enjoyed it.
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March 7, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I love it!
I hope sirius start siding with Tom and not just Harry, and a big NO defamation bill that would be in danger and discover Harry and I like it enough to
I would like to know more about Remus, how it goes with the wolves and if you see something fennir,
I hope you update soon!
kisses
lariza
I hope sirius start siding with Tom and not just Harry, and a big NO defamation bill that would be in danger and discover Harry and I like it enough to
I would like to know more about Remus, how it goes with the wolves and if you see something fennir,
I hope you update soon!
kisses
lariza
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March 7, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter - as usual. i really appreciate your characterizations. You write very well and I look forward to your updates. When I saw the update for No Obvious Truths (another of my favorites by the way) I was hoping there was an update for this one coming soon.
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March 5, 2013 at 12:00 AM
whem I finished descent amd saw that you had adopted breeding,I had been worried that I wouldnt like it once I got to the chapters you were wrting but Im glad to see that isnt true and Im eagerly awaiting the next chapter. thanks for continueing a good story
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March 2, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I really like your part of the story. Fake vision is a good move )
As emancipation, and I wait for Dursley's house burning))
I just want to point out few things I noticed ^^"
Some of them the already been mentioned in the reviews, but I wrote them anyway for consistency sake ^^"
1. Lucius concerns in the first chapter about V's consort. - He already sorted out through them in the original story.
2. Dumbledore using Voldemort's true name Tom in conversation with Snape and, much later, with Bill Weasley. - Name Tom Riddle not a common knowledge and V. completely abandon it long time ago so D. would've use just Voldemort.
3. Harry lives a day at Hogwarts, then around 10.30 apparate to the Abbey, USE time-turner to go 24 hours back, lives day at the Abbey and again around 10.30 apparate back to Hog. So Harry travels then he had fake vision would be:
Harry had a vision, apparate to the Abbey, turn back 24 hours despite nausea (after that pain in the scar would've gone as he in the past now ) and arrived 10 minutes later then he should. On the next day he apparate to H few minutes early, so he get vision and pain in the tunnel.
Instead in that two chapters the time-turner use are backwards.
4. In the same fragment Tom came check on Harry, then he doesn't walk in their room shortly after walk out, but he can sense H. energy appearing and disappearing then H. apparate, so it would be more logical if he was worried about why Harry stays at one place and why so much pain go though the link.
4. In original story mentioned what Oct.31 is Thursday.
Nov.1, then Lucius brought Narcissa to the Abbey, was Friday. That was there original story end.
In your part there was also meeting with Severus.
Nov 2 Harry left Griffindor tower early and had a vision somewhere around 10.30, so he was 10 minutes late. It was Saturday.
Part with the Ron POV has to be on the next day, because then Ron gathered all company Harry thought that was about night before (vision). But then that part takes place on Nov.3, Sunday! Yet, somehow Ron with the others go to the classes.
On the next part Harry wokes up "after two days straight of visions", so it must be Sunday morning in Abbey, yet he thinks about sleeping in on upcoming weekend in Hogwarts. As he apparate back at 10.30 there's not much of weekend left.
5. On the next morning in Abbey (it's would be Monday, so whole day in the Hog missed) Sirius portkeyed in, despite the fact what he never get portkey to Abbey.
6. In the 36 chapter Harry "for the first time he could feel Tom in" the ring. But he could before! That's how he checked daily if Dumbledore destroyed it. Also, "disconnect the connection"?))
7. In the last chapter Harry says "... It was his half-sister that had the Light."
Morgan was Arthur's half-sister, not Merlin's (in the Aya's story too).
8. Hermione translated old Elves book with Ginny and Harry. She know about Merlin being the Dark Lord.
Wow, the list appears quite long now ^^"
As emancipation, and I wait for Dursley's house burning))
I just want to point out few things I noticed ^^"
Some of them the already been mentioned in the reviews, but I wrote them anyway for consistency sake ^^"
1. Lucius concerns in the first chapter about V's consort. - He already sorted out through them in the original story.
2. Dumbledore using Voldemort's true name Tom in conversation with Snape and, much later, with Bill Weasley. - Name Tom Riddle not a common knowledge and V. completely abandon it long time ago so D. would've use just Voldemort.
3. Harry lives a day at Hogwarts, then around 10.30 apparate to the Abbey, USE time-turner to go 24 hours back, lives day at the Abbey and again around 10.30 apparate back to Hog. So Harry travels then he had fake vision would be:
Harry had a vision, apparate to the Abbey, turn back 24 hours despite nausea (after that pain in the scar would've gone as he in the past now ) and arrived 10 minutes later then he should. On the next day he apparate to H few minutes early, so he get vision and pain in the tunnel.
Instead in that two chapters the time-turner use are backwards.
4. In the same fragment Tom came check on Harry, then he doesn't walk in their room shortly after walk out, but he can sense H. energy appearing and disappearing then H. apparate, so it would be more logical if he was worried about why Harry stays at one place and why so much pain go though the link.
4. In original story mentioned what Oct.31 is Thursday.
Nov.1, then Lucius brought Narcissa to the Abbey, was Friday. That was there original story end.
In your part there was also meeting with Severus.
Nov 2 Harry left Griffindor tower early and had a vision somewhere around 10.30, so he was 10 minutes late. It was Saturday.
Part with the Ron POV has to be on the next day, because then Ron gathered all company Harry thought that was about night before (vision). But then that part takes place on Nov.3, Sunday! Yet, somehow Ron with the others go to the classes.
On the next part Harry wokes up "after two days straight of visions", so it must be Sunday morning in Abbey, yet he thinks about sleeping in on upcoming weekend in Hogwarts. As he apparate back at 10.30 there's not much of weekend left.
5. On the next morning in Abbey (it's would be Monday, so whole day in the Hog missed) Sirius portkeyed in, despite the fact what he never get portkey to Abbey.
6. In the 36 chapter Harry "for the first time he could feel Tom in" the ring. But he could before! That's how he checked daily if Dumbledore destroyed it. Also, "disconnect the connection"?))
7. In the last chapter Harry says "... It was his half-sister that had the Light."
Morgan was Arthur's half-sister, not Merlin's (in the Aya's story too).
8. Hermione translated old Elves book with Ginny and Harry. She know about Merlin being the Dark Lord.
Wow, the list appears quite long now ^^"
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February 27, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Great chapters.
I love how Bill is really thinking about what is going on.
Can't wait for more.
I love how Bill is really thinking about what is going on.
Can't wait for more.
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February 26, 2013 at 12:00 AM
great udpate!
I hope Bill makes the right decision.
I hope Bill makes the right decision.
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February 25, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Hermione and Bill have a lot to think about. I hope both of them will end up on Harry's side.
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February 16, 2013 at 12:00 AM
This is good, I think you do Athey's plot justice.
Only bit I find a bit of a shame, is that the chapters aren't as long as Athey's.
But than again, you do update a lot more than she did, so it balances a bit.
Keep up the good work!!
Only bit I find a bit of a shame, is that the chapters aren't as long as Athey's.
But than again, you do update a lot more than she did, so it balances a bit.
Keep up the good work!!