rate_review Reviews

Write more it's good. Please email me when it's up

love this story!!! keep up the good work!!

:) I was so glad to see you were back! I'm dying for the next chapter, I love your choice in how to do this CreatureFic, love it a lot :)

love story need more updates please really want to know what is going to happen next

Hey, I enjoy your story, but I keep reading in your a/n's that you're not satisfied with your chapters. I think your problem is that you lack some major detail. You keep having to clarify things in your authors notes that should have been mentioned in the actual story. A Good example is the scene with baby draco and harry. A good way to clarify that it was Ms. Figgs home and not a typo is to give more detail as such. i.e: "A shakkey legged Draco stumbled across the living room. His pale eyes, which had yet to change from the generic color of all infants, watching the dark haired infant crawl unsteadily around the room. Ms. Figg sat on her couch chatting with Lucius who looked ready to kill one of the squib's felines the insisted on pawing at his hair.
The dark haired boy ignored everyone else in the room in favor of watching Draco move gingerly to his hands and knee's. The blonde crawled over to Harry, giving him a look that said, 'Like this, dummy.' Harry stiffened his limps and mimicked Draco, determination etched in his little face. When he had made his way across the room to Draco's side, he smiled, meetings the blondes eyes. A high pitched laughter escaped him as Draco returned his smile and reached out, putting a clumsy hand on his head.
Ms. Figg turned her attention from Lucius to the sound and said amazed;
"Thats the first time I've ever seen him smile."

Notice how I didn't just say it was a certain house but you can gather it is ms.figgs home. Alot Nor did I just come out and say that Draco was trying to teach Harry how to crawl, but you can figure it out easily from certain details.
I know details can be annoying to right and if you're not satisfied with a chapter, walk away, watch tv, sleep on it. next morning, you'll easily figure out whats missing. I hope you take this for what it is, constructive criticisum and helpful tips.

I love this new chapter and am so glad about harry and draco. Look forward to the next chapter

Very nice! Will Neville join Ginny in spying on the light?

Poor Altari! How horrible!!!

All I can say is.....More please, loved finding out the sub story of her and can't wait for Harry to talk with her...

That is to sad.