AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Pandora's Box - COMPLETE

by Suziesu74

person ayronya
schedule February 23, 2016 at 12:00 AM
Amazing, the perfect tale of love, lust and obsession. The story is mainly Smut yet you still manage to weave an incredible plot! You are a wonderfull writer! You should really take pride in your writing, because you reserve it
person delia cerrano
schedule June 2, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Terrific story and I'm going to look up your teaser for your new "Altered State" story.
schedule February 27, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Hot stuff.
person Kelei
schedule February 10, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Lovely
person Sirin Black
schedule May 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
i loved this story, i didn't want it to end!!
person Anon
schedule November 13, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Absolutely loved your story.
schedule November 13, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I loved this story start to finish. I'm putting it in my Recommended reading because it's too good to lose track of. ^_^ and thanks for the preview chapter I must say it looks awesome. any if you're keeping up the kin then I am keeping up the reading. ^_^
person Jen
schedule November 11, 2011 at 12:00 AM
That sex scene was SO hot with the right amount of fluff. GUHH!! I thought I was going to explode reading that. I love what Snape's other tattoo ended up being. I can't wait for this new story. That scene was worth the wait! Again, Guhhhh! You've teased me, but now you must deliver!
person Molly
schedule November 11, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I wish you didn't end the story!!! Please change your mind and keep writing more for this!!!
person Rainien
schedule November 8, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I've really been enjoying the story so far. It's rare these days that a Snarry holds my attention for more than a chapter or two. Kudos to you for that! I love the BDSM them and the OFC Vivienne is a wonderful addition. She seems slightly on the Mary Sue side to me, but not in a way that becomes annoying.

I have one matter to point out, though, and I hope you will see it as a help and not a flame.

A sentence contains a subject *and* verb. It must have both. A good one-third of your "sentences" are missing one or the other. In my opinion, it slows down the flow of the story, making it feel choppy in a start-stop-start again manner.