schedule
November 9, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Loved it just wished it was longer but I'll be looking to read more of your stuff keep up the excellent writing.
schedule
August 7, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but I tried, and I couldn't do it. This oneshot, in its current format, is unreadable. Its just one huge block of print that boggles the eyes. Please fix the formatting; separate your paragraphs and dialogue. Perhaps a beta would be a good idea; in the little that I did manage to read, I saw quite a few punctuation mistakes, and in some places, no punctuation at all. I really would like to read this, so please, do consider making the changes.
schedule
August 7, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I agree with the other reviewer... it's extremely hard to read or make sense of the oneshot as it is currently. I did manage to get to the end of it but it was hard to enjoy the story with the distraction of the format. Just fixing it from being in one block of text to separate paragraphs would go a long way in improving things.