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June 17, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Oh my goodness! This story is so....I've never read anything like it. The way you characterize everyone is spot on, and I think that's what makes it so gripping. This seems like it could very well be an extension of the books. I love the way you describe the Ministry and it's efforts to rebuild and the politics and reactions to the aftermath. It all seems so messy and awkward like it's supposed to be. Harry's thoughts on why they needed to continue with the puppet show were so insightful. I loved how Skeeter is still the bitch and how Harry and Ginny snapped on her. Although, I'm worried about how this may come out for Ginny. And Ginny...man oh man. First, I love how Hermione gave good advice but it wasn't the right advice for Ginny. lol. And the chemistry between her and Harry is there, but his cluelessness and sense of being noble, as usual, is getting in the way of seeing what's really going on. Very good depiction of Harry there. The anger Ginny showed towards him was thus very understandable, and you actually had me siding with her more. I loved her lines in that scene. The "maybe if I had just given him a blow job" part made me cringe and then smile. She's so fiery and smart. I hope that Harry calls her bluff and bends her over a table soon :) This is so enthralling, I'm really enjoying myself.
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June 16, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Oh man, this story was recommended to me by Salon_Kitty, and I'm so glad I checked it out. If the first chapter is any indication, this is going to be quite a ride. I can't wait to see where you're going with this. I think I'm going to make this my new bedtime story, so I can have something to look to every night. So far, really well done. I love the battle scene, very intense, yet simple. You have a real knack for using few words to get to the heart the matter. It's a trait in writing I really envy. And I love this tortured Ginny. You're definitely showing another side to her that I find very believable. And the glimpses into her and Harry's sex life were HOT. I hope there's more of that :) See you tomorrow night....
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June 12, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Oh wow. That's not so much mood swings as 'completely jumped off the deep end' Really makes sense though. I gathered BDSM is some thing you really should do if you genuinely trust each other. Hermione should really have put a stop to this before it started but of course no one could really comprehend Harry going as far as he did because he's such a nice guy really.
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June 12, 2010 at 12:00 AM
What. An. Opening. Lol.
Well, once again, I'm a bit breathless by the severity of Ginny's punishment and the depths Harry has sunk in his depravity. While you've done a fantastic job of showing us how Ginny's mind has folded in on herself, what you've shown us with Harry's psyche is fascinating. I love Harry's dark side, and hell, you brought it out in full force here. He's so abusive to his girlfriend, it's kind of heartbreaking to know that he's been locking this side of himself under wraps for as long as he's been connected to Voldemort.
First, a beta note--One of his hands threaded through his hair. I think that was meant to be 'his hands threaded through her hair. Also, sometimes you say, 'was stood', instead of, 'standing'.
This line:
'Oh, but I love you as a whore,' he said. 'You give me so much more satisfaction.' Made me giggle. Harry getting into his dirty side, full throttle, is hot. But I can definitely see how having the freedom to debase her gives him the opportunity to revel in being 'bad', finally.
I will say, as my only word of criticism, the fact that you have placed this story not that long after the war ends with Harry vanquishing the Dark Lord, makes me think that these three are still essentially teenagers, even through all that they've endured, and they tend to speak like adults in their thirties. But, it's a fantasy, and I'm fine going with it.
Harry losing his shit while caning Ginny is familiar territory for me, so I ardently approve. *thumbs up gesture here* But when he thinks this: She'd brought this on herself. She'd betrayed him; she'd made him see what he was inside. She hadn't brought Riddle out of a Boggart... she'd brought Riddle out in him. Wow, that so articulated his struggle and why he's so upset with her. With that one line, the reader is suddenly fearful that Harry can't come back from this.
And crap, should I have not told you that I loved how close Hermione and Harry are in this? 'Cause that friendship is over. Or, at least, in tatters. I would think it's going to take a while for her to ever forgive Harry for what he did, both to Ginny and to Hermione. I wasn't expecting a full-on duel! Although, lol, I loved his innocently played compliment to her about her thighs. And I loved Harry thinking that this was all like being someone else for a change.
By the time we get to this:
He leant over Ginny moving one hand over her back, while the other stroked her hair. His mouth came forward to whisper in her ear. 'Because I want her to watch.' I'm totally Harry's bitch. Fuckin' 'ell, that was hot. Then when he starts demanding she call him 'Lord', that's when my mouth dropped. Whoa. Seriously in touch with his dark side, now. Going to town on her at that point made total sense, but I'm glad she was able to get through to him. The last gesture he gives her made me hopeful. Now they just have to get through the wrath of Hermione, lol.
Yay, I get one more chapter to look forward to!!
Well, once again, I'm a bit breathless by the severity of Ginny's punishment and the depths Harry has sunk in his depravity. While you've done a fantastic job of showing us how Ginny's mind has folded in on herself, what you've shown us with Harry's psyche is fascinating. I love Harry's dark side, and hell, you brought it out in full force here. He's so abusive to his girlfriend, it's kind of heartbreaking to know that he's been locking this side of himself under wraps for as long as he's been connected to Voldemort.
First, a beta note--One of his hands threaded through his hair. I think that was meant to be 'his hands threaded through her hair. Also, sometimes you say, 'was stood', instead of, 'standing'.
This line:
'Oh, but I love you as a whore,' he said. 'You give me so much more satisfaction.' Made me giggle. Harry getting into his dirty side, full throttle, is hot. But I can definitely see how having the freedom to debase her gives him the opportunity to revel in being 'bad', finally.
I will say, as my only word of criticism, the fact that you have placed this story not that long after the war ends with Harry vanquishing the Dark Lord, makes me think that these three are still essentially teenagers, even through all that they've endured, and they tend to speak like adults in their thirties. But, it's a fantasy, and I'm fine going with it.
Harry losing his shit while caning Ginny is familiar territory for me, so I ardently approve. *thumbs up gesture here* But when he thinks this: She'd brought this on herself. She'd betrayed him; she'd made him see what he was inside. She hadn't brought Riddle out of a Boggart... she'd brought Riddle out in him. Wow, that so articulated his struggle and why he's so upset with her. With that one line, the reader is suddenly fearful that Harry can't come back from this.
And crap, should I have not told you that I loved how close Hermione and Harry are in this? 'Cause that friendship is over. Or, at least, in tatters. I would think it's going to take a while for her to ever forgive Harry for what he did, both to Ginny and to Hermione. I wasn't expecting a full-on duel! Although, lol, I loved his innocently played compliment to her about her thighs. And I loved Harry thinking that this was all like being someone else for a change.
By the time we get to this:
He leant over Ginny moving one hand over her back, while the other stroked her hair. His mouth came forward to whisper in her ear. 'Because I want her to watch.' I'm totally Harry's bitch. Fuckin' 'ell, that was hot. Then when he starts demanding she call him 'Lord', that's when my mouth dropped. Whoa. Seriously in touch with his dark side, now. Going to town on her at that point made total sense, but I'm glad she was able to get through to him. The last gesture he gives her made me hopeful. Now they just have to get through the wrath of Hermione, lol.
Yay, I get one more chapter to look forward to!!
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June 11, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Sorry for the late review. >_<
First on the grammar error. I believe you meant to put 'he must know' not 'he must do'.
As for the latest chapter, it was another great one and I still eagerly await the climax! :D
Ginny and Harry are almost more of a match then before in a sort of weird way now that they both have got past the perfect image they had of each other. I like it! I will be fun to see where Hermione will fit into the next chapter as well.
I can't really say anything else that Salon_Kitty hasn't already said in her review.
Keep up the awesome work sir!
RedWhammi
First on the grammar error. I believe you meant to put 'he must know' not 'he must do'.
As for the latest chapter, it was another great one and I still eagerly await the climax! :D
Ginny and Harry are almost more of a match then before in a sort of weird way now that they both have got past the perfect image they had of each other. I like it! I will be fun to see where Hermione will fit into the next chapter as well.
I can't really say anything else that Salon_Kitty hasn't already said in her review.
Keep up the awesome work sir!
RedWhammi
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June 5, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Oh my. Harry's bad. Baaaaad to the bone. And for some reason, spying on people for their own good, seems perfectly in character for Hermione.
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June 5, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Ho-ly crap.
Your Harry is just about the sexiest Bastard!Harry I've ever read. I kept highlighting lines he uttered so I could comment on them, but there were too many! This thought that Ginny had stood out, though: There was a monster lurking behind Harry
Your Harry is just about the sexiest Bastard!Harry I've ever read. I kept highlighting lines he uttered so I could comment on them, but there were too many! This thought that Ginny had stood out, though: There was a monster lurking behind Harry
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June 1, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Another great chapter! I can't wait for the next!
Although I agree that it was kind of short. That's understandable though, since you re-wrote the chapter.
I can see how things had the opportunity to turn cruel. Though, I have a natural curiosity about what you had written, I am personally glad it did not go that route; 'sexy' is good heheh and this chapter tugged hard enough on my heart strings. I feel really bad for both Ginny and Harry and I can't wait for the story to come to climax, hopefully with sexy results ;). The story has continued to be great to read either way though; you have a talent at writing! Do what YOU feel is best and I'll keep on reading it!
The only other thing I wanted to mention was a slight grammar error that caught my attention; no worries they get past the best of us: "He knew, he must do, that she
Although I agree that it was kind of short. That's understandable though, since you re-wrote the chapter.
I can see how things had the opportunity to turn cruel. Though, I have a natural curiosity about what you had written, I am personally glad it did not go that route; 'sexy' is good heheh and this chapter tugged hard enough on my heart strings. I feel really bad for both Ginny and Harry and I can't wait for the story to come to climax, hopefully with sexy results ;). The story has continued to be great to read either way though; you have a talent at writing! Do what YOU feel is best and I'll keep on reading it!
The only other thing I wanted to mention was a slight grammar error that caught my attention; no worries they get past the best of us: "He knew, he must do, that she
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May 28, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Just caught up with this. Good, very dark, obviously, but good. I liked Harry's defeat of Boggart-Voldemort. As well as the description of his room, which was a nice touch.
The Author's note only made me curious though: what was the original version of the chapter like?
The Author's note only made me curious though: what was the original version of the chapter like?
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May 28, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Well, you know, Julian, now that you say that, I TOTALLY want to read that chapter you tossed! I'm so curious where you were heading with it before you decided you'd gone too far.
My biggest criticism of this chapter is that it was too short! That went by way too fast. However, I found Harry's reaction completely in keeping with his character (I LOVED the details in his room!), and I'm really glad that he spoke to Hermione about it. Poor Ginny is at such a low end, and I can understand Harry's feelings of betrayal, but at least he has Hermione's insight to keep him grounded in what his messed up girlfriend is going through.
For another person, there might have been hesitation, but Harry faced his demons. He knew no other way.
I loved this line. So true, and it makes me love Harry so much. Very excited about your next chapter. (Oh, and feel free to email me if you decide to let me see that other draft). By the way, what do you think of H/Hr? Not in this story, obviously, but I am working on something.
My biggest criticism of this chapter is that it was too short! That went by way too fast. However, I found Harry's reaction completely in keeping with his character (I LOVED the details in his room!), and I'm really glad that he spoke to Hermione about it. Poor Ginny is at such a low end, and I can understand Harry's feelings of betrayal, but at least he has Hermione's insight to keep him grounded in what his messed up girlfriend is going through.
For another person, there might have been hesitation, but Harry faced his demons. He knew no other way.
I loved this line. So true, and it makes me love Harry so much. Very excited about your next chapter. (Oh, and feel free to email me if you decide to let me see that other draft). By the way, what do you think of H/Hr? Not in this story, obviously, but I am working on something.