AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Running Away

by BasiliskSerpent

schedule May 3, 2009 at 12:00 AM
yeah harry left the Dursleys. Great story
person artemyl
schedule May 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Well, it's too early for me to really say whether I really like it or not, but it is a pretty good start. Also, as a side note, it's matriarch not patriarch.
schedule May 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Okay, so...I think I'm probably going to like this story a lot. As long as you stick with it, of course (which I know can be hard to do, but I have high hopes as of right now). I can never get enough of these crossovers. =] As far as criticism goes, I would say that you could use a beta, to help with some small errors (i.e. some spelling mistakes which probably happened because you were typing the chapter in a hurry and...well, Russia's not a continent \= ) Also, I would use 'thoughts' and *parseltongue*. Or maybe [parseltongue]. I just think that the asterisks are a little distracting for things as common in your story as Harry's thoughts. Otherwise, keep it up sweetie! I can't wait for your first update. Adieu.
schedule May 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
hope you update soon love harry/twilight.
schedule May 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Oh, and the matriarch/patriarch thing, which Aella has already pointed out... =]