AFF Fiction Portal
schedule August 8, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I reeeeeeallly dig h/hr love/sex slave stories so u def have my attention sir. One thing that has been nagging me tho is the constant exclamation points. Surely Harry/whomever is talking isn't raising their voice every other sentence?....
schedule August 8, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Have you thought on who you will get to join them....i think it should be a Slytherin xxxxx
person oldwolf
schedule August 8, 2008 at 12:00 AM
An excellent story. A good deal of setup, but oddly enough, all the better for it. The descriptions are both detailed and sensual.

My only real suggestion is to get a good beta-reader. There are several consistent word usage mistakes which detract from the smooth reading of this story.

Aside from that, excellent story and I look forward to the next chapter.
person Uthra
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Nice

I am looking forward to read MOAR !

And am curious if Harry will be up to take responsibility of Hermiones's life and decisions in public.

How long do you plan to make this story btw?
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Loved this story concept please update soon!!! If you need a beta let me know my email is www.diagon@gmail.com

Cheers
LP
person LadySaphire
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
ok getting chills.....good ones with goose bumps
person Uthra
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Good preparing chapter. I liked the conversation at the end.

I am glad you made this not just into a game for Hermione, not just a bedroom-slave, so that hopefully we'll not only see the 'sex' side of things, but also their interactions and reactions from the outside. Like the teachers or maybe even her parents...

Looking forward for MOAR either way.

oh, eh, is this story or your writing in general discussed anywhere? Because this review system is not the best there is... or how would you like to get future inspiration / motivation?
person pfeil
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Hope Harry quickly gets his act together to be what she needs.

Though I suppose getting there slowly could be a fun ride too =)
person pfeil
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
None of the books mentioned safe words?
schedule August 7, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Interesting I would like to see more... plz update when you get more written