rate_review Reviews

The average weight gain for the first trimester is only 2-4 pounds--it seems odd that Hermione would have tripled that in two months; she's going to have some pretty noticeable stretch marks. I also don't understand why someone as responsible and sensible as Hermione would not use birth control.

The developing relationship between Draco and Hermione is interesting.

So, I just started reading your story yesterday,
&& I have to say,
I'm a little iffy on it.
Firstly,
The whole 'Miya' thing.
It bothers me that you have Hermione's friends calling her Miya because nowhere in any of the books was she ever called that.
She is called Mione sometimes, but Miya isn't even close to her name.
Secondly,
I do agree that you need a beta.
Perhaps it may help if you went through your chapters && read them over because in quite a few places you have made mistakes that I'm sure you don't need a beta to fix.
Particularily in the first 3 chapters I think it was when you'd forget to put a question mark at the end of a question.
Also, a lot of the characters are terribly OOC.
However, this story does have a lot of potential.
I am in no way claiming to be an expert on writing stories (I myself have terrible grammar).
I hope it doesn't seem like I'm bashing you or your story because that is not my intention,
I'm just one writer trying to help another writer improve their story.
Anyway, I look forward to another chapter.
My email is x.cotton.x.candy.x@hotmail.com
Please email me when you have updated.

Much Love...
XXX

I wasnt going to read this cuz I dont like when hermione doesnt tell who the father is, but I must say you pulled it off pretty well. At least her friends know.

Hey Sis,

Great Job! I have read all the chapters well done. I cannot wait to read more.

To id # 3001216385: Everything she has written happened to me and the other female members of my family.

Every symptom at every week in this story I went through and I am not imagining it no woman that goes through pregnancy can ever forget what she went through and when. To make sure I remember I wrote a Journal documenting my pregnancy. It was something members of my family made clear that you want to look back on it.

You should know since you are an obstetrician that no two women are alike. You take two women and ask them to keep a journal about their pregnancy and I guarantee you that their journals will be different in symptoms.

You wrote, "You don't get morning sickness till closer to 2 months"

You want to bet I had nausea/morning sickness after only two weeks.

You Wrote, "You don't show until at least 4 months and that

hey great chap. i loved that you put in the bit about the cat litter. A lot of people don't know that cleaning cat poop is dangerous to preg. women and so they don't put it in their fics. Your right about the gaining weight thing. It is different for every women. I started to gain weight early on. I got morning sickness after i missed my monthly. I had it for about two months for some women it's even longer. It also depends a lot in the mothers normal weight. i was chubby even before my pregnancy so i nobody could really even tell that i was pregnant until my seventh month! You can hide your stomach with sweaters or even ponchos. The skinnier you are the harder it is to hide the stomach cause it's more noticible. And it also depends on how much weight the baby is gaining. my baby's weight was 6lb and 11 onces which is quite normal. I gained about 30 lbs. i bit too much in my opinion. :) Great job! OH and are going to give her strech marks?

This is the same anon from earlier. I didn't use a user name because I don't have one.. i am not a registered user. I am though a board certified obstetrician with over 13 years experience with pregnancy labor and birth. I would say that I have slightly more experience with pregnancy then someone who has a couple relatives who had babies. Go ahead though and write the way you want. I left your review to help you not to cause all the little kids who read it to light torches and grab pitchforks.

Just keep writing. Do not let the anon comment get you down. So far from what I read and researched, everything you have written is creditable.

No two women are alike during pregnancy.

Great Job!

Just roll with it let the bad comments go I have done some research on your story it all jives you are correct each woman is different my mom said the same thing and says to keep writing to anon review there is nicer ways to get your point across than insults

TO ANON id # 3001215983/id # 3001216385

"Now I wanted to show how grossly ignorant you are of pregnancy and suggest you go to your library and read through "what to expect when you expecting'. You could skim it and learn enough to at least write this closer to reality"

WTF? THAT WAS RUDE! It's anon reviewers like you that make authors turn off their anon reviews.

Next time you want to make a point why don't you take a tip of kindness from Snowe and roseyspecs. They got there points across without being rude.

Hello reality? This is Harry Potter and from what I experienced during pregnancy, everything she has written gels.

The Heartbeat

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/prenatal-care/PR00112

Says here baby's heart starts to beat at week 5 although HUMANS cannot hear it. However, like she says in her fic Hermione DID NOT go to the doctor and hear it. LUPIN HEARS IT! He is a werewolf-enhanced senses.

Lighten up it is a story and her info gels.

KEEP WRITING! There is lots of readers that don't give a shit about what is textbook info we all know that each woman is different.

Aly (Email Hidden) 2008-07-26 id # 3001216405
Hey id # 3001216385I : Ever heard of the phrase "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."

You are certified obstetrician with over 13 years experience with pregnancy labor and birth...Whoopie!

The fact you even reviewed in the manner you did makes me question your bed side manner. You could have kindly told her your information. Not call her ignorant.

She is not ignorant I can vouch for that she is far from it. She may not have gone to Yale or Harvard but let me tell you she is highly educated and a very talented woman.

Saffron you don't listen to the crap people spew. Do it your way. You are doing fine. All your info is right on. Every woman is different.