rate_review Reviews

I think this is a nice snapshot of a budding relationship, so I wouldn't worry about the fluff. There isn't much of a chance for a true conflict to reveal itself, but that is what one shots are. I think it would be interesting for you to continue this story now that you have matured as a writer.

I became intrigued by "Fantasy House," and decided to read some of your other stories, and I am surprised to find that you haven't written many Snape/Hermione stories with the way you have portrayed him in your latest story. Please update it soon.

I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?

If this is what you come up with merely 'dabbling' at work, then I am quite pleased to read your work.

I absolutely love fluff stories. It's anice break nt to have drenched knickers when I go home, LOL. Although, this one was pretty good! XD

Well I hope you continue it. Althought he may be a bit fluffy that isn't a bad thing. It can be a alternate universe kind of thing if it does barther you. But I hope there are at lest a few more chapters.

I would still love to read a continuation of this :)
Its beautiful and sweet and i really like it.

PLease? :)
Jocy

love the start of that
its cute
sweet

please email me when you write more

angelinaguerin23@hotmail.com

aww so cute i loved it i hope that theres some more

Were this a generic student/teacher romance vignette, I would say it is a well rendered one. You are obviously a competent writer. However, for a Snape/Hermione pairing it doesn't quite work. I have nothing against Snape fluff, quite the contrary ;-), but there has to be rhyme and reason to it. Both Severus and Hermione are skewed so much out of character here that it's nearly grating. It seems like a romance of two teenagers, not that of an older teacher with issues and a smart, yet inexperienced girl. The piece would work well if it were a later chapter in a much longer story, where both characters would gradually develop into the way you are depicting them. I hope you don't mind my honest opinion, there is absolutely no ill will behind it, just a suggestion for improvement. Cheers, Madietta

Well I like it but if you feel the need to work the bugs out then by all means do. Its hard to nail down Severus's personality especially when you want him a bit OOC. Please continue with this story I would love to see where this goes.

Hello,
Well because you did admit that it was overly fluffy, I'll be honest and tell you what I really think. First its a good story, but Hermione would never have spoken her feelings out loud like that. So that made me cringe a bit. Then there was the who smiling Snape thing. He doesn't really smile, his lips curls upwards, he sneers and raises his eyebrow really sexily :P
But you can make them share more intelligent conversation and lemons if you continue the story - it does have potential, you just need to make sure you've got a good plot to build the relationship round. Have you read A Merciless Affection by Verity Brown on fictionally? Its brilliant and really brings out the dark, sexy Snape if you're interested.
Best of luck and hope you don't mind the comments
Kitty