rate_review Reviews

Chapter 21

Yup! Your story here is so enjoyable that
I reread it from the beginning three times
so far!!!

I love the pattern that you've established; eating,
training, f@cking, torturing, confusion and finally
understanding!!! It's great!!

Love Malfoy's "Just give him a healing potion afterwards,

Excellent chapter. Poor Harry was so confused! Evil Lucius....watching Harry and Snape O.o Hahaha...keep it up!

Believe me, it's an absolute pleasure to read and review such an excellent story! Even though I've read through it on your live journal page, I still read through again when you post here because this story is so impressive. I agree totally with DarklessVasion, who said this is a strong story. It's flawless. Even having read it several times now as I wait for updates, I grow more impressed each time I do, as well as with the other stories posted on your journal page. Again, it's a pleasure to read and review such outstanding work. You've said on your journal that you are going to write a book. When you do, please let me know. I'll be first in line to get it!

Chapter 20

These two are hysterical at times!!!
The competition, the training, the repartee--
all are lots of fun!!!

As these two grow to really care for one another,
the killing of Voldemort will have even more
importance than before. Very well done in keeping
their characters totally MALE!! No wishy-washyness here!!

Thanks,
R

As I've said before, I've gone to your livejournal page and read ahead, all 36 of the chapters that you have posted there, but will leave reviews for you here. I've also read your latest entry on your livejournal page and see that it will be awhile before you will post any more of the story on that site. I just want to tell you that while I understand what you're saying and feeling, particularly about feeling discouraged about your story and the reasons why, you have every right to be proud, VERY proud of this story and your writing skills!! Please don't doubt yourself as to your abilities as a writer, and please believe me when I say, as I'm sure many others will agree, that your story is without a doubt one of the best, if not THE best, stories on this or any other site. It's a shame that you can't publish this story as a book, because I'm sure it would be a best seller!

Even though your characters actually belong to somebody else, you've obviously sat down and given a lot of time and effort to come up with an original plot that still keeps within the original story, and is still believable. You've kept the characters within the boundaries of the way they were originally written, yet have expanded their personalities, thoughts, feelings and actions, without requiring painful stretches of imagination on the part of the reader to make them believable as well.

As for doubting your abilities as a writer, let me say that you have nothing to worry about. Your story is astonishingly well written with a style that exudes confidence and is very smooth, with excellent flow. You have a masterful command of the language and the ability to write very evocatively, with great depth of feeling, all which make an enjoyable experience for any one with an appreciation for an intriuging story and exceptional writing skills.

I was so relieved to see in your journal entry that you fully intend on completing this story. I don't think that I could stand it if you didn't, and I hope that your problems with betas leaving and working out whatever weakenesses you said you've seen in this story are resolved soon. The only "weakness" I can see anywhere in this story is that the "performance" between Severus and Harry is a bit repetitive, but then I can't say that I actually perceive this as a weakness. They both view it as a performance, something that they are required to do, not as something they choose to do, and in this way the repetitiveness of their "performances" serves your story line.

I am by no means a literary critic, but I've been voraciously devouring books from an early age, and know a good story when I read one. This, my dear Starcrossed, is very definitely a GOOD story, and I will continue to follow your postings on this site as well as on your livejournal page while I wait for you to update. I'm dying to read more as soon as possible, but having said that, this story is so good, that for however how long I have to wait, it will most definitely be worthwhile.

Awesome chapter! I should have checked which chapter I was reviewing before hitting that link. Ah well. Once again, well done. I love the idea of Snape proclaiming Harry as the greatest wizard of all time! Or whichever it was. lol Yeah, I'm a helpful reviewer, aren't I? I can't wait to read your next chapter.

"Come over here where the light is better." lmao! >< that has to be my favorite line so far; it reminds me of FairlyOdd Baby when everyone goes out side and they say: "Hey, the light really /is/ better out here," lmao XP anyway, good chapie- looking forward to the next ^^

Good chapie! Harry and Snape are playing Voldemort like a harp!

Chapter 19

OMG!!! Your story is the best!!! It's been so long since I've
been so engrossed!! Okay!! Gushing aside, I love the slowly developing
trust growing between the two. Dumbledore appearing to HP ought to
help Harry but he is so NOT in a trusting mood!!

I personally hope that they are cooped up together for a few years!!!
Loves SS' constantcy throughout. Love that SS is very educated!! (Makes
everything that much more interesting!!) Love the way you capture HP's youth
in the conclusions he constantly draws, which are many times inaccurate, but from his
lack of experience, in such circumstances, in makes for very pleasurable
reading!!

Thanks,
R

Amazing! Just got back from your livejournal entries. Absolutely am dying for the next chapter. You have some mad writing skills, my dear, and a wonderful imagination. Such a strong story; emotions, tension, suspense and sngst. (Here is where I mention that I'm the biggest angst-whore ever!) Please don't leave us hanging for too long. Hmm, an interview. (Lovely links of clips and pics from your reviewers. I don't have a livejournal account and don't feel comfortable trying to post there.) Thank you so much for the entertainment (and feeding the angst beast! LoL) -- Miki