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July 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Heh, poor Harry. He knew his bits were going to be gone right before the delivery but it really didn't hit him until it actually happened.
Great chapter
update!
Great chapter
update!
schedule
July 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
oh i am so happy to see a new chapter added...this is one of 3 stories i am following religiously...i felt so bad for harry and sev this chapter...we all know what its like to be pregnant and crabby...but i have to tell you when harry said my bits are gone...i damned near pissed my pants...too funny...now the evil cliffie...hope that wait is not too long...he comes the babies soon...i hope...
awesome chapter keep up the good work
awesome chapter keep up the good work
schedule
July 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
There are several things I like about that chapter. When I read it the first time, I thought the emotional one waiting on his lover was Harry. I was happily surprised that it was Snape. I don't know if you intended that, but it worked for me. I also like that Snape was so worried about Harry that he forgot what he wasn't wearing. Now, that's love.
schedule
July 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 2
Everytime I read a Harry/Severus story whether it's been slash or Severitis, I am always amused when Harry says, "...erm..." I just think that would drive Severus absolutely crazy. I don't know why. It amuses me though to think of him loving Harry and still wanting to smack that speech mannerism out of his mouth.
I like the uneasiness you've portrayed in the relationship with Severus guilty for making harry possibly quit his job. Severus and guilt go hand in hand.
Poor Harry and his little "... Surprise..." at the end of the chapter. That's sad.
I must say, I do like how you handle the characters. They are still Harry and Severus, just nicer to each other.
Chapter 3
I see Severus can still switch to the professorial mode. Him lecturing harry on the child's safety and then suddenly realizing they were going to be parents, that was nice.
Chapter 4
"Severus, although he'd loosened up somewhat in the years they'd been together, was still so tightly buttoned up emotionally its a wonder he didn't squeak..." Tha't's so a Harry line. Very good.
Again the Severus guilt. Maybe he was Catholic in his former life.
I do like the way you handled the Lily issue. She was his all for so long, but him being with Harry doesn't seem incestuous (which is the feeling I get when I read some Snarry.) I would like to have felt the bowl of the toilet, smelled the acid of the vomit, tasted the bile that rose. That would have given Severus' suffering dimension.
Everytime I read a Harry/Severus story whether it's been slash or Severitis, I am always amused when Harry says, "...erm..." I just think that would drive Severus absolutely crazy. I don't know why. It amuses me though to think of him loving Harry and still wanting to smack that speech mannerism out of his mouth.
I like the uneasiness you've portrayed in the relationship with Severus guilty for making harry possibly quit his job. Severus and guilt go hand in hand.
Poor Harry and his little "... Surprise..." at the end of the chapter. That's sad.
I must say, I do like how you handle the characters. They are still Harry and Severus, just nicer to each other.
Chapter 3
I see Severus can still switch to the professorial mode. Him lecturing harry on the child's safety and then suddenly realizing they were going to be parents, that was nice.
Chapter 4
"Severus, although he'd loosened up somewhat in the years they'd been together, was still so tightly buttoned up emotionally its a wonder he didn't squeak..." Tha't's so a Harry line. Very good.
Again the Severus guilt. Maybe he was Catholic in his former life.
I do like the way you handled the Lily issue. She was his all for so long, but him being with Harry doesn't seem incestuous (which is the feeling I get when I read some Snarry.) I would like to have felt the bowl of the toilet, smelled the acid of the vomit, tasted the bile that rose. That would have given Severus' suffering dimension.
schedule
July 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Cbapter 5
Great job, Harry. lets make Snape ralph some more. Poor Severus should have seen Harry wanting mre children.
Chapter 6
I like how you've included Severus' aging body in the description of his morning wake up. That was a good detail.
I loved the Severus made a mistake conversation. Harry's glee is just too funny.
Chapter 7
Ron's a git. Severus is a little happy, I can see, but getting used to the idea will take some time.
Harry really effed up telling Molly first. REALLY. I know she's the closest thing he has to a mom, but Severus should have been the first after Poppy.
Severus better shape up soon.
I like this story. It engages the reader without too much sentimentality.
Great job, Harry. lets make Snape ralph some more. Poor Severus should have seen Harry wanting mre children.
Chapter 6
I like how you've included Severus' aging body in the description of his morning wake up. That was a good detail.
I loved the Severus made a mistake conversation. Harry's glee is just too funny.
Chapter 7
Ron's a git. Severus is a little happy, I can see, but getting used to the idea will take some time.
Harry really effed up telling Molly first. REALLY. I know she's the closest thing he has to a mom, but Severus should have been the first after Poppy.
Severus better shape up soon.
I like this story. It engages the reader without too much sentimentality.
schedule
July 23, 2008 at 12:00 AM
oh my god i absolutely love this story, funny and emotional, takes me back to the days of my pregnancy lol cant wait for the birth chapter :)
schedule
July 12, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Your story is extremely well written - am enjoying it immensely. The only disappointment is that I now have to wait for updates!
The descriptions of the character's thoughts and emotions . . . fits them, they're not completely ooc. And there's a flow to the prose, it keeps me engaged. Some stories I've read, and stopped reading after a page or so, start an idea and then jump to something else - there's no connection, no FLOW. Nothing can be as distracting as really poor grammar and lack of continuity - things I don't come across in your stories (so thanks!) The occassional spelling glitch isn't as distracting as in some stories I've read (oi!) . . . I often think I've developed a new muscle in my brain that fixes spelling errors as a I read fanfiction, and as long as there aren't so many as to overload this new programming, I don't really see them much anymore.
Love the fact that Ron gets one up on Hermione AND Snape *smirk*. You put these little splashes of humour in unexpected places - quite delightful :)
Sooo . . . now that you have one more devoted fan, is it enough incentive to put up another post?? *wink* Ta.
The descriptions of the character's thoughts and emotions . . . fits them, they're not completely ooc. And there's a flow to the prose, it keeps me engaged. Some stories I've read, and stopped reading after a page or so, start an idea and then jump to something else - there's no connection, no FLOW. Nothing can be as distracting as really poor grammar and lack of continuity - things I don't come across in your stories (so thanks!) The occassional spelling glitch isn't as distracting as in some stories I've read (oi!) . . . I often think I've developed a new muscle in my brain that fixes spelling errors as a I read fanfiction, and as long as there aren't so many as to overload this new programming, I don't really see them much anymore.
Love the fact that Ron gets one up on Hermione AND Snape *smirk*. You put these little splashes of humour in unexpected places - quite delightful :)
Sooo . . . now that you have one more devoted fan, is it enough incentive to put up another post?? *wink* Ta.
schedule
June 29, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Sweet chapter, and I liked how you didn't reveal who was doing the worrying until the end.
schedule
June 29, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 2
I can imagine that Severus would be quite the protective worry wart over a lover. His life has led him to expect the worst from fate, I believe. Yummy schoolmasterly fantasies are in my mind right now when you saidt he bit about Snape's teacherly instincts kicking in.
Mr. worst case scenario and the twenty questions. That bit was funny.
Chapter 3
"It, however, comes as no surprise that it's you that finally did it." Funny line. I loved it. Oh, and now Harry is suddenly breakable because he's a little preggers? I like the humor you use in the story.
Chapter 4
I'm glad you gave an overview of their coming together. The whole Lily factor is why I'm so squicked by Snarry romances,but you make it seem almost like Harry is Snape's true love and Lily was the means for him to find him. I like that better than Snape trying to get the mother through the son.
Yes, it always comes back to Dumbledore. Lay everything at his feet. Darn him makin Snape love Potter. I am feeling pathos that Snape might go through.
CHapter 5
I can imagine that Severus would be quite the protective worry wart over a lover. His life has led him to expect the worst from fate, I believe. Yummy schoolmasterly fantasies are in my mind right now when you saidt he bit about Snape's teacherly instincts kicking in.
Mr. worst case scenario and the twenty questions. That bit was funny.
Chapter 3
"It, however, comes as no surprise that it's you that finally did it." Funny line. I loved it. Oh, and now Harry is suddenly breakable because he's a little preggers? I like the humor you use in the story.
Chapter 4
I'm glad you gave an overview of their coming together. The whole Lily factor is why I'm so squicked by Snarry romances,but you make it seem almost like Harry is Snape's true love and Lily was the means for him to find him. I like that better than Snape trying to get the mother through the son.
Yes, it always comes back to Dumbledore. Lay everything at his feet. Darn him makin Snape love Potter. I am feeling pathos that Snape might go through.
CHapter 5
schedule
June 29, 2008 at 12:00 AM
ARGH! I hit the wrong button and lost my review. I like the story. I've encountered a few lines that were just too funny. I wish I hadn't lost the review.
Lily is the reason I'm usually squicked by Snarry stories, but the way you handle her memories with Snape make it seem as if Harry was her gift to Snape. He's not trying to recapture her, he loves Harry for himself.
I did like the way you handled the whole pregnancy conversation and the angst that followed. One thing that would lend your story more depth would be to add sensation, the smooth surface of the toilet seat, the smell that is unique to Harry, the taste of the wine or the vomit, bitter and vile.
Lily is the reason I'm usually squicked by Snarry stories, but the way you handle her memories with Snape make it seem as if Harry was her gift to Snape. He's not trying to recapture her, he loves Harry for himself.
I did like the way you handled the whole pregnancy conversation and the angst that followed. One thing that would lend your story more depth would be to add sensation, the smooth surface of the toilet seat, the smell that is unique to Harry, the taste of the wine or the vomit, bitter and vile.