AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for [Untitled]

by MerenwenFefalas

person jamescun
schedule November 20, 2011 at 12:00 AM
plz write more
person luvhp
schedule June 24, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Oh Gods!!!
That was HOT!
person RyuaAlba
schedule October 27, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Mmm, I like it. Short, but very hot.
schedule October 11, 2007 at 12:00 AM
This story was fantastic! It was sweet and sexy.... oh GAWD was it ever sexy!!!!!! You should write MOOOOOORE!!!!!!!
schedule October 7, 2007 at 12:00 AM
This was just wonderful and lemon-y!I love it!
person Utopia
schedule October 5, 2007 at 12:00 AM
If they've been "playing" and "experimenting" for years, then perhaps this isn't as unrealistic as you think it is - especially with the use of the green toy stretching them - that first time wouldn't have been so bad. What would have made it unrealistic wasn't in here - so I won't dwell on that noncence! (lol). I did quite like this - it wasn't cliche or boring, it was nicely written and not vulgar.

I do have two small complaints though: (1) Any chance of a title?
(2) Any chance of more description? facial expressions, surroundings, bodily figures, sounds, feelings, emotions ... just to give it a more 3D edge to it and add that little bit more to the imagination.

Even so, a pleasure to read.