schedule
September 8, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Great story hope you write more soon //goth
schedule
September 8, 2007 at 12:00 AM
A very interesting start, but I think that SG-1 team is too trusting and things happen a bit too quickly.
Like with the house-elf. A strange creature appears in a top-secret military base and trained soldiers don't think that it may be a threat, they just let it do whatever it wants. And Jack immedietly wants to take Harry, even though he doesn't know him. Maybe throwing in something about Charlie would help. Or that Harry spend a few days in infirmary and SG-1 was visiting him and formed some kind of attachement would make the story more believable.
But still it's a good idea and I'm looking forward to seeing more.
As to where I'd like it to go, I don't really know. Just some ideas:
- meeting with the Tokra, calling Jakob "grandpa" and meeting Anise
- Harry talking with Tealc's 'Junior'
- Harry being able to read Goauld or Ancient, because it's similar to written Parseltongue
Like with the house-elf. A strange creature appears in a top-secret military base and trained soldiers don't think that it may be a threat, they just let it do whatever it wants. And Jack immedietly wants to take Harry, even though he doesn't know him. Maybe throwing in something about Charlie would help. Or that Harry spend a few days in infirmary and SG-1 was visiting him and formed some kind of attachement would make the story more believable.
But still it's a good idea and I'm looking forward to seeing more.
As to where I'd like it to go, I don't really know. Just some ideas:
- meeting with the Tokra, calling Jakob "grandpa" and meeting Anise
- Harry talking with Tealc's 'Junior'
- Harry being able to read Goauld or Ancient, because it's similar to written Parseltongue