AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for The Heir

by Tumshie

person lisa
schedule December 1, 2006 at 12:00 AM
awww that was bitter sweet. cute. and very nice ending.
person angel
schedule December 1, 2006 at 12:00 AM
awww that was sweet i loved it .. later for now

angel
person JZ
schedule December 1, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Hey, I liked your plot! It is a good story, but in my opinion you could have taken more time to let the plot unfold. You moved your story very fast forwards. I would have enjoyed more if you had focused more on the developing relationship of Harry and Hermione. You have a lot of happenings in the story but you hardly let them explain themselves. I mean, let the character to the work my adding more direct speech or so. Anyway, I don