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January 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
There is no need to apologize for not getting where you think the reader thinks you should be.... did THAT make any sense? LOL
Set up is very important. I'm enjoying what you've written thus far. Your character actions and words are working. You've got a great start ... keep doing and stop apologizing.
Set up is very important. I'm enjoying what you've written thus far. Your character actions and words are working. You've got a great start ... keep doing and stop apologizing.
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January 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
One suggestion... since this story is a pairing of Hermoine and Draco... you may want to get some of Draco's point of view pretty soon. He is the one who has alot of changing to do to either be worthy of Hermoine.... or to explain his own thoughts and feelings so we can understand what it is he is or isn't doing. It's just a suggestion, I like what you're doing so far, I just thought the hero of the piece would like a say-so soon. :-)
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January 20, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Hello! great story so far... I like that it is fast-paced and well-written. The dialogue between the characters is entertaining and sharp. I'm going to be checking for updates, so I hope you will post again soon. I also like the way you have portrayed the characters - particularly Hermione and Draco. I look forward to reading more!
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January 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Another new chapter! Well now what are they going to do with that hat! Can't wait for part II and I think you're doing a wonderful job. This isn't going to bode well I don't think for house unity. The hat's only going to cause trouble. Great idea there though. Makes for good conflict. Oh, please email me about a story. I have a question. Thanks!
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January 19, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Can't wait to read part II!, the sorting hat is not gonna sort? I love that you keep malfoy arrogant, i also liked a lot the dialog, they have to fight (verbaly) Plese update soon!!
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January 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Hey! New chapter. Yes I loved the dialogue. It wasn't over the top, just right. Ron's temper is fun to play with though. I liked how you mentioned that Draco was enjoying his argue,ment with Hermione until Ron showed up. I think even in the books he makes too much of an effort to start arguements and make rude comments to her. Good chapter and I like the flow and pace so far. So what that they're not to Hogwarts yet. The build up is always fun to read too!
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January 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
i very much enjoyed the last bit. the opening was so sad and it's gonna be so hard to see ginny at school knowing her death is imminent.
great tension between the heads. very true to character but still opportunity for more realistic dramione. never cared for it when they get to ooc.
hope you update soon.
great tension between the heads. very true to character but still opportunity for more realistic dramione. never cared for it when they get to ooc.
hope you update soon.
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January 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I love this! I think it's great that you kept them so much in character, not changing Draco to make him nicer. The whole reason why we all love him so much is because he's and arrogant little shit! lol Anyway, i think it's great!
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January 18, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Ch.3.
Up to here I like the fic a lot. Really nicely done. You can feel the emotions of the characters, I wonder...
Yeah I really want to see the next chapter :)
Up to here I like the fic a lot. Really nicely done. You can feel the emotions of the characters, I wonder...
Yeah I really want to see the next chapter :)
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January 16, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Hey, you've posted your own fic! That's great. I like it very much so far and can't wait to see how you develop the plot. I liked your prologue and descriptions very much. Wonderful job. Update soon please.