rate_review Reviews

Look forward to more...

Another very strong chapter. There were a few minor spelling or verb tense errors, but nothing that would hamper the enjoyment of reading this. I would like to make a suggestion though. Please name your chapters instead of numbering them. When I am following a story, it is easier to remember a chapter title than it is to remember I stopped reading on chapter 14. In the story "Darkness, Shadows, Light", the author Maddy uses clever sayings as chapter titles, whether or not they have anything to do with the story.

Are you going to have another Dark Lord rise? It would serve them right if they needed Harry and he refused to help them.

"He kept his reasons to himself, for obvious reasons". Maybe could have been more like "he kept his motivation to himself, for obvious reasons". Try to avoid using the same noun in a sentence twice. Something one of my professors used to beat me over the head about. I actually feel strange making suggestions for your work as you are one of the best writer's already that I have seen posting on any fanfic site.

Ok, I have read all four chapters and am enthralled. Now I am looking forward to dialog and interaction between these two. I do not mind short chapters as you are using them to divide the action. Nothing is worse than a really long chapter that start at point A, travels here, there, and yon, then leaves you totally confused. I hope that you continue this story as I find it unique and so well thouht out.

Great start! I hope you continue this story. I' want to see what happens. Will the people who betrayed him ask for forgiveness? Will Harry become himself again? Please continue!

Wow--this is really great! I like the idea, it's not bad and your grammar and spelling isn't horrible at all! There may be a few switched words, but that's a given with any story--and this is coming from someone who can't even read anything when theres a single word misspelled. >.<

One thing, I mean... it's your fic and all, and well written, but it could use a bit more detail. Not rediculously so... but just to draw it out a bit more because at the place it is now, it's almost--almost rushed. And I think if you gave your ideas a bit more merit and time, this fic would be even better than it already is. ^_~