rate_review Reviews

THIS SUCKS!!!! go back to fanfic if you cant write better then this. try dong some ... uh... research!

sorry, but you could write a bit better. be more creatitive

rushed

Not bad, but too rushed, and grammar and punctuation need work - if I have to mention it to a writer, it's bad enough to spoil my enjoyment.

capital letters are your friend, little fanbrat

LMAO this was really BAD! therefore, i am adding it to my Recommended Reading list!!

Friggin' in the riggin'
Friggin' in the riggin'
Friggin' in the riggin'
There was fuck all else to do

-who loves ya, baby? FINKY loves ya, baby!

Right okay I know how it is to write a fic and be so exited about it that you put it up straight away but it really is worth it to look over it for spelling mistakes and puntuation mistakes before you put it up. I find it helps to revisit it after about an hour or so after writing it, so that you read it with fresh eyes. Also Fred and George really didn't 'discover' their love. I know that if I were helping my sister get dry after geting wet I wouldn't start suddenly coming onto her because...well...ew, basicly. Perhaps if you'd explained they already had feelings for each other and a little more nervouseness about what they were doing would have been better. I'd advise you to look over this and perhaps read some more fred and george fics.

Good luck!

*Eowyns elixure

it has potential but its a bit rushed, i think you should probably sit down and read through it again and make some changes, i would read it again if you re-wrote it.

Sex scene was awful, and capital letters are your FRIENDS. It won\'t kill you to use them.

This is good but it was kinda rushed. Also its a good idea to have some one beta things. But I love the idea of Fred and George in the prefects bathroom. I find the whole thing very hot.
:D Sammi