rate_review Reviews

Update, Update, UPDATE!!!!!!!!

ARGH!!! Cliffies are bad! This is an excellent story, though. You and your beta are doing very well with the spelling and grammar. Please update soon!

Everyone lusting after Severus is hilarious. I cannot wait to read the next chapter. Keep up the great work!!

loved this story i hope to read more of it. keep updateing ^_^

HAHAH!!! I am adoring this story right now!!! Please update soon!!

nice! when will u update?

ewwww gross gross gross lol that was so funny, i cant wait for the next chapter please update soon, huggles and candy ella xxxxxxxxxx

The horror! Oh the horror!! How could you torture poor Severus like that?!

omg.... poor Sev!
Teehee, i wonder what really happened int he dungeons...
Can\'t wait for more
Chow for now!

I\'m sorry, but you really need a beta, or to proof-read your text yourself. Some parts were so difficult to understand, that I finally gave up trying two thirds into the story. And not because I didn\'t like the story - but because I didn\'t like how much of a struggle reading it was.

Examples:

[He blinked (*his*) eyes stupidly while Pomfrey continued to smooth !!!its!!! hair, and then started to caress the side of his face, going down slowly towards his neck as if she was taking his pulse. The only problem was that he knew the procedure well, i.e. he was placed under magic control and something inside of him warned him that this wasn