schedule
October 26, 2005 at 12:00 AM
awesome fic ^_____^
good job & i\'m gong to read sequel... right now. XD
good job & i\'m gong to read sequel... right now. XD
schedule
September 10, 2005 at 12:00 AM
alright, this story has a good plot or whatver, but you have to write the descriptions about what is happening around them, and you could manage to write what they are thinking also.
another point id have to discuss, is that this story is too lovey dovey. harry potter, wouldnt act that way, due to his past. if you have read the 5th and 6th book when he is dating, you can sort of notice that he doesnt seem to be open with his girl friends. you are making harry too much of an open person, and getting his girlfriend pregnant when he is at this age wouldnt be something wed call good news, and do you possibly think that you would be happy getting your girlfriend pregnant, knowing that she has two years of school ahead of her?
you didnt even make harry seem to be shocked about it, and madam promfey being happy about it? come on! if you are going to write a story, you have to be realistic about it, about the characters personalities and such, and relation them with j.k rowlings book.
another point id have to discuss, is that this story is too lovey dovey. harry potter, wouldnt act that way, due to his past. if you have read the 5th and 6th book when he is dating, you can sort of notice that he doesnt seem to be open with his girl friends. you are making harry too much of an open person, and getting his girlfriend pregnant when he is at this age wouldnt be something wed call good news, and do you possibly think that you would be happy getting your girlfriend pregnant, knowing that she has two years of school ahead of her?
you didnt even make harry seem to be shocked about it, and madam promfey being happy about it? come on! if you are going to write a story, you have to be realistic about it, about the characters personalities and such, and relation them with j.k rowlings book.
schedule
September 10, 2005 at 12:00 AM
While your story is a bit Cliche I will give you props for writing it. You need some work on your plot, grammer & overall storytelling but
its not a bad story, just needs refinement.
Keep writing and soon you\'ll be able to write like the best of them (fan writers that is).
its not a bad story, just needs refinement.
Keep writing and soon you\'ll be able to write like the best of them (fan writers that is).
schedule
September 10, 2005 at 12:00 AM
It\'s Math time. If she got pregnant over christmas break (Dec/Jan) and she was 7.5 months pregnant that would be Jun-Aug time frame. They wouldn\'t be in school. FYI.