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October 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
One of my fav fanfictions. I wish you would finish the Sequel.
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August 4, 2006 at 12:00 AM
WOW! I love your other fics but this is totally good too! I cant wait to read the sequel!
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July 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I don\'t want this to be over but if it must then I can\'t wait for the sequel!
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July 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
::Clears Throat::
Please for the love of Voldemort fans EVERYWHERE make him act like he does in the book this time. And do work on your *fight* scenes, cause I noted that you either skipped them completely or made them unbelievably short (The Basilik fight was CHEAP: it couldn\'t see AND Draco barely had to fight it.)
As a matter of fact: make them ALL act in character because they were WAAAAAAAAAAY OOC. I understand with a different storyline/background they would be *different* but what I mean is at the very least, make them act like they would from the book if they WERE in that situation. Cause I swear Harry was a friggin girl. It got down right laughable.
And in the sequel, I would like to hope it consist of more than Tom (if he\'s in it) kidnapping poor Girly Harry and trying to marry him again. That would...suck. Make him EVIL for goodness sakes. I mean you had the whole deranged thing going for you ( as he refused to see Harry didn\'t love him) but make him actually EVIL.
And make sure things make sense this time:
Why were the people so shocked and thinking Draco had *stolen* Harry from Tom when they all HEARD Harry scream he didn\'t want to marry Tom because he didn\'t love him? Where they like, not paying attention at all or what? And what was Hermione\'s purpose? You made it seem like she would end up helping Draco or that her finding out thing about Harry would actually come into use/play when it never did/happen. And what the HECK happened to Draco\'s men during the fight scene after the Hermione/Draco battle? Why would they just LET Tom try to kill Draco, not once, but twice?
Furthermore, you need to be more detailed, use more depth when you right. The fights scenes are proof of that. But at a lot of times, it felt like it were rushed.
And for the love of sanity stay away from cliche` adventure storybased storylines from now on--UNLESS you\'re going to be detailed about it. And you really DON\'T have to end every single chapter with your chapter title--makes the chapter seem more limited. (Though the last one actually fit rather well.)
Longer chapters wouldn\'t hurt either, but then, that comes with better detailed chapters.
The story wasn\'t bad: It was Just lacking.
I\'ll be looking for your sequel.
Please for the love of Voldemort fans EVERYWHERE make him act like he does in the book this time. And do work on your *fight* scenes, cause I noted that you either skipped them completely or made them unbelievably short (The Basilik fight was CHEAP: it couldn\'t see AND Draco barely had to fight it.)
As a matter of fact: make them ALL act in character because they were WAAAAAAAAAAY OOC. I understand with a different storyline/background they would be *different* but what I mean is at the very least, make them act like they would from the book if they WERE in that situation. Cause I swear Harry was a friggin girl. It got down right laughable.
And in the sequel, I would like to hope it consist of more than Tom (if he\'s in it) kidnapping poor Girly Harry and trying to marry him again. That would...suck. Make him EVIL for goodness sakes. I mean you had the whole deranged thing going for you ( as he refused to see Harry didn\'t love him) but make him actually EVIL.
And make sure things make sense this time:
Why were the people so shocked and thinking Draco had *stolen* Harry from Tom when they all HEARD Harry scream he didn\'t want to marry Tom because he didn\'t love him? Where they like, not paying attention at all or what? And what was Hermione\'s purpose? You made it seem like she would end up helping Draco or that her finding out thing about Harry would actually come into use/play when it never did/happen. And what the HECK happened to Draco\'s men during the fight scene after the Hermione/Draco battle? Why would they just LET Tom try to kill Draco, not once, but twice?
Furthermore, you need to be more detailed, use more depth when you right. The fights scenes are proof of that. But at a lot of times, it felt like it were rushed.
And for the love of sanity stay away from cliche` adventure storybased storylines from now on--UNLESS you\'re going to be detailed about it. And you really DON\'T have to end every single chapter with your chapter title--makes the chapter seem more limited. (Though the last one actually fit rather well.)
Longer chapters wouldn\'t hurt either, but then, that comes with better detailed chapters.
The story wasn\'t bad: It was Just lacking.
I\'ll be looking for your sequel.
schedule
July 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
what a cute fairytale!
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July 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Thank you for a very well written fic! I love the pacing of your story...not boring and not leaving details not touched.
I would always look forward to each updates and now i am looking forward to your sequel.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful fic!
Cheers!
I would always look forward to each updates and now i am looking forward to your sequel.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful fic!
Cheers!
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July 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
What a beautiful Ending! its sooo sweet! I cant wait till August 3rd! I want to see More Harry and Draco!
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July 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
*standing ovation*
OH what a great ending! I love this. I love you. Please write the sequel soon. I\'ll even send you some more strippers! How about cowboys again? ^_^ Great job sweetheart. Keep up the good work.
Luv & Snuggles,
Jen
OH what a great ending! I love this. I love you. Please write the sequel soon. I\'ll even send you some more strippers! How about cowboys again? ^_^ Great job sweetheart. Keep up the good work.
Luv & Snuggles,
Jen
schedule
July 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
i can\'t wait to read the sequel
schedule
July 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Alrighty:
1. For the love of GOD, in the sequel don\'t make Harry hit anyone with his fist. I swear I died laughing everytime.
2. This really seemed like one of those old, cheesy classics about damsels in distress. Really, I forgot Harry was a boy most of the time. It was bad though, don\'t get me wrong.
3. A sequel sounds good....just make Tom (if he returns) defeat more interesting. And brainwashing of some sort. That\'s always fun. I dunno...make him more like...VOLDEMORT...
1. For the love of GOD, in the sequel don\'t make Harry hit anyone with his fist. I swear I died laughing everytime.
2. This really seemed like one of those old, cheesy classics about damsels in distress. Really, I forgot Harry was a boy most of the time. It was bad though, don\'t get me wrong.
3. A sequel sounds good....just make Tom (if he returns) defeat more interesting. And brainwashing of some sort. That\'s always fun. I dunno...make him more like...VOLDEMORT...