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September 9, 2008 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
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July 2, 2007 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
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February 28, 2007 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
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December 26, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I hope that you will decide to continue this story at some point in the future. I'd love to see how this one turns out.
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June 26, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I really like this story alot. Can you please write some more chapters?
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February 3, 2005 at 12:00 AM
You have a quite hilarious spelling error. Hermione\'s mom would not have been inferNal, but inferTile.
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February 3, 2005 at 12:00 AM
YOU HAVE GOOD IDEAS. YOU NEED GRAMMAR, SPELLING, AND PUNCTUATION. TRY TO THINK A LITTLE DEEPER ABOUT HOW EACH CHARACTER ACTS AND WHAT THEY BELIEVE IN. HERMIONE SEEMS VERY DIFFERENT IN THIS STORY. I LOVE YOU IDEAS, THOUGH. YOU KEEP WORKING AT IT, AND YOU\'LL HAVE A WONDERFUL FIC.
schedule
February 3, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Since you have already promised to improve your language, I will not complain too much about it. There is, however, another thing that gets to me:
\"they talked of ridding the world of all those that they deemed unnecessary\"
So they sat there, happily plotting genocide. And how exactly is this supposed to make us sympathise with them?
Look, the death eaters killed muggle-born for no other reason than that they were muggle-born. No matter how biased history may be, that one fact stands. Malfoy even gloated about it in *Chamber of Secrets*. They tortured the Longbottoms. Voldemort tried to kill a baby.
I agree that the Ministery of Magic was not perfect - their treatment of half-bloods and magical creatures attest to that. But at the end of *Order of the Phoenix*, they sent the captured Death Eaters to Azkaban. They did not execute them.
And when Hermione\'s \"real\" mother listed up the only Pureblood families left, she seems to have left out
Black
Weasley
Longbottom
etc.
Yes, it is a fascinating question how Voldemort could rise to power and lead a group of racist bastards when he himself was one of the people they looked down on. You would have been much better off exploring that issue, rather than writing this. And please, do not make the Death Eaters the nice guys. It is insulting to everyone who have ever experienced racism.
\"they talked of ridding the world of all those that they deemed unnecessary\"
So they sat there, happily plotting genocide. And how exactly is this supposed to make us sympathise with them?
Look, the death eaters killed muggle-born for no other reason than that they were muggle-born. No matter how biased history may be, that one fact stands. Malfoy even gloated about it in *Chamber of Secrets*. They tortured the Longbottoms. Voldemort tried to kill a baby.
I agree that the Ministery of Magic was not perfect - their treatment of half-bloods and magical creatures attest to that. But at the end of *Order of the Phoenix*, they sent the captured Death Eaters to Azkaban. They did not execute them.
And when Hermione\'s \"real\" mother listed up the only Pureblood families left, she seems to have left out
Black
Weasley
Longbottom
etc.
Yes, it is a fascinating question how Voldemort could rise to power and lead a group of racist bastards when he himself was one of the people they looked down on. You would have been much better off exploring that issue, rather than writing this. And please, do not make the Death Eaters the nice guys. It is insulting to everyone who have ever experienced racism.
schedule
February 2, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Awsome chapter! Update soon! How are the others going to react?
Tiffany
Tiffany
schedule
February 2, 2005 at 12:00 AM
This could be a good story, however, you need to work on your grammar, punctuation, and capitalization. If you don\'t know how to do this properly, please get a beta reader to help you, OK?