AFF Fiction Portal
person Jen
schedule November 23, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Well... It was odd ! I do not like so much the idea of Herm being rapped but if the next chapter Hermione \'s becoming more willing so yes, i want read the next chapters !

person sarah
schedule August 1, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Wow! this story is great. i love it so far. whats gonna happen with Umbridge? i hope she gets caught in her own game. that would be hilarious. please please please finish. it is addictive....
schedule July 18, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Maybe you could have Hermione pregnant??? (With Snape\'s kid or something) and then you just go from there. If you need a beta reader, e-mail me!
katy@rjgross.com!

Love the story and I can\'t wait to seee! Ce!
person proofreader
schedule July 18, 2004 at 12:00 AM
You need a beta or something use use your spelling and grammar are terrible.
person iproofreadu
schedule July 18, 2004 at 12:00 AM
You need a beta or something because your spelling and grammar are terrible.
person Charybdis
schedule May 31, 2004 at 12:00 AM
That was weird. Ironically, you do stream-of-consciousness well, and for once develop the emotional trauma of rape rather than the physical. But your story could use a lot of improvement. First off, where are you going with this? Second, segment your text into nice easy-on-the-eyes paragraphs. Third, cut out all of the excess. Fourth, edit spelling and grammar more scrupulously. Fifth, I\'m rather fond of Snape--what have you done to him?! Why has he done such a horrible, torturous, despicable, painful, wretched, terrible, traumatic, disfiguring thing? Sixth, where are you going with this? You have the potential to be a much better writer, but you must put more effort into your work than you have here.
schedule May 3, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Yes I am reveiwing my own story
I am telling you all to review
Now
person Nikichan
schedule May 3, 2004 at 12:00 AM
Great job on this one. You personify Harry, Ron, and Hermione perfectly. I can actually hear the characters say what you write, that means you have great skill.
person Chris
schedule April 19, 2004 at 12:00 AM
hi
great idear when will the next chapter be up?
can you tell me?