AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Deadly Nightshade

by Hijja

schedule September 28, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Beautifully written!

Rather abstract but really engaging. Really well done.
person Shay
schedule July 18, 2007 at 12:00 AM
Wow...I definitely dig this. I like how strongly you played out the emotional aspect of it, rather than writing it as "look how kinky Death Eaters can be!" Great work.
person Shannon
schedule November 22, 2006 at 12:00 AM
wow! a second person narrative...you don't see many of those! good work man!
person nikki
schedule July 23, 2006 at 12:00 AM
i don't see why you should be so insecure about it. sure, it deviates from the typical PWP stories you'd normally find but this has it's charm. Tonks, ah, you'd feel sorry for her, but then, there's always Bellatrix, sadistic, twisted...you showed them well. After all, in the stories, Tonks does play a minor part and you don't really think of her as insecure so this was a refreshing new view on the family entaglements. Nice work!
person Hijja
schedule December 12, 2003 at 12:00 AM
Dear a. nony. mous.,
I just have to point out how very much I appreciate your feedback. You\of cof course spot on about OOC-ness, and you caught me right out about gratuitously playing around with stream-of-consciousness :). Thanks not only for your honest reaction, but also for posting constructive criticism for something you did *not* like. That\'s more than I could have asked for, and makes me deeply grateful. I\'ll try and avoid further pitfalls in the future :).
Most sincere thanks, Hijja
person a. nony. mous.
schedule December 2, 2003 at 12:00 AM
Nervousness is warranted; it just doesn\'t really...work. The interruptions with Tonks\' thoughts are trying to be stream of consciousness, but don\'t manage to be compelling enough, and the way the time flows (up to the point of the beginning, it seems) really gives it away as the literary trick it is--oddly enough, good stream of consciousness writing generally has to be very planned out. Bellatrix getting kinky with her niece also doesn\'t really work-she seems to be a real race fanatic. (Not to mention, when did she get the free time?) I really like some of your other work--I think Art of War is the best--but this doesn\'t even really have an emotional impact. Not a flame, just an honest reaction. :)